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Social Etiquette and Good Manners/salutations
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Question
QUESTION: Hello,
I really never know, when writing a 'thank you' note (or any note) to friends and family, whether to put the woman's name 1st or the man's. And then when signing it too. i.e. Dear Dick & Jane? or Dear Jane & Dick? Then: Love, Dick & Jane? or Love, Jane & Dick. Will you help me? Thanks, Robin
ANSWER: Dear Robin:
The rule is that when you sign a letter, the other persons for whom you are also signing have their names first in order of age. Love, Gary, Cameron and Cynthia (Cameron is my son, Gary is my husband). Notice that your name will always be last. When you address recipients at the beginning of the letter, the man's name is first - the same as you would address Mr. and Mrs. Dick Johnson. If there was a child his name would be last.
Thank you for your question.
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: How about when you are addressing an envelope to a couple who is not married yet (and have a child). i.e. Jane Smith, Dick Moore (and 1 1/2 yr. old). Thank you again for your advice, Robin
Dear Robin:
The proper way to address an envelope for two people who are living together but not married is:
The person you are closest to - Mr. Dick Jones
The person you are not as close to - Ms. Jane Smith
address
one above the other.
The child does not have its name on an envelope - children don't have a place on an envelope until they are 13. When they are younger than that, invitations for the child are sent in care of the parents.
Thanks for your question.
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Answers by Expert:
Cynthia W. Lett
Expertise
Proper manners with friends,family,colleagues,neighbors and everyone else you know.
Experience
I have been an etiquette expert teaching and consulting on the subject worldwide since 1983. I started and serve as the Executive Director of the International Society of Protocol & Etiquette Professionals and am considered a leader in the field of etiquette and protocol training and execution. I edited "Etiquette for Dummies" and have recently written "Lett's Talk - Everyday Etiquette Dilemmas and What to Do about Them". My book, "That's So Annoying:An Etiquette Expert on the World's Most Irritating Habits And What To Do About Them" was published in 2009 and is available wherever books are sold.
I taught the Business Protocol class to Master's level students at the George Washington University, Washington, DC for seven years
I served as Chief of Protocol for MCI Telecommunications for three years.
Organizations
International Society of Protocol & Etiquette Professionals, ASTD, PCMA, National Speakers Association
Publications
I have been quoted over 700 times in the past 5 years worldwide. Publications include Wall Street Journal, Washington Post, Washington Times, NY Times, Washington Business Journal, USA Today, Associated Press, London Times, Newsweek Japan edition, Newsweek US edition and many many more.
Education/Credentials
I am a Certified Etiquette Professional (CEP) and Certified Protocol Professional (CPP) earned by examination through ISPEP.
I have a Master's degree in hospitality law and undergrad degrees in Restaurant & Hotel Management and Public Relations/Interpersonal Communications from Purdue University.
Awards and Honors
Who's Who Worldwide,Who's Who of American Women, Distinguished Darden Professor (Purdue University).
Past/Present Clients
World Bank, United Nations,US Dept. of State, US. Dept. of the Army, Pentagon, Barclays Global Investors,Accenture,Fox News, MSNBC, CNN, The White House, Dept. of State, AT&T,Bank of America,American Association of Clinical Pharmacies,Ritz Carlton Hotels, Hilton Hotels, Marriott Hotels,Starwood Hotels,and many more.
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