Expert: Amanda Gamble - 6/24/2009

Question
I've sent my nephew checks for birthdays and most recently his high school graduation, and was wondering, are there any guidelines for the length of time one should hold onto a check before cashing it?  Last year, the check I sent did not clear my bank for more than two months, and I never did receive any acknowledgement or thanks.  The check I sent him for his graduation three weeks ago has not yet cleared the bank.  Because they have had problems with mail going missing in the past, this forces me to contact my brother to see if my check has been received, and so far, it always has been.  Is it OK to ask that the check be deposited at their earliest convenience?  Is it OK to not get in touch and simply stop payment after four to six weeks if I haven't heard anything?  Thank you very much for your advice.

Answer
Dear Terry,
  If you meant for the child to have the money originally,stopping the
check would not be the correct thing to do. No matter how irritated
you are with the nephew. Yes,please call and say "My bank shows that
the birthday or graduation check has not been deposited. I was
worried that it had been lost or damaged in some way..."  That should
get the result that you desire.  

   Perhaps cash in the future or as the child is now technically an
adult you may stop sending birthday gifts.

                                        Best regards,
                                           Amanda Gamble