AboutAmanda Gamble Expertise I will answer any etiquette question you`d care to ask!
I will be happy to give friendly non-judgmental advice on any situation.
If your question is rude,incoherent or demands I confirm your "victim" story,
I reserve the right to refuse to answer. Life is too short.
Certain cultures and customs are not part of my personal
experience,but I will research to get the needed answer.
Time specific questions may or may not get answered by your deadline.
Experience I have been writing a daily etiquette advice column for 8 years.
I have taught as well as given lectures on the subject.
Question I AM PLANNING AN INFORMAL BUT VERY SPECIAL SURPRISE 50TH BIRTHDAY PARTY FOR MY HUSBAND, IN A HALL ON THE BEACH. I HAVE NEVER REALLY HOSTED SUCH A PARTY BEFORE AND I WOULD APPRECIATE YOUR ADVICE TO MAKE IT A SUCCESS.
I AM INVITING ABOUT 60 OF OUR CLOSEST FAMILY AND FRIENDS AND IT IS IMPORTANT TO ME THAT AS MANY OF THEM AS POSSIBLE BE ABLE TO ATTEND. THE PARTY WILL TAKE PLACE DURING VACATION SEASON AND MOST PEOPLE SCHEDULE THEIR VACATIONS MONTHS IN ADVANCE. GIVEN ENOUGH NOTICE, I KNOW MOST OF THE GUESTS WOULD SCHEDULE THEIR VACATIONS AROUND THE PARTY DATE. I WAS THINKING OF SENDING "SAVE THE DATE" CARDS 3 MONTHS BEFORE THE PARTY AND THE INVITATIONS 1 MONTH BEFORE THE PARTY. WHAT DO YOU THINK?
ALSO, I'M COMFORTABLE WITH THE FOOD PLANNING, BUT I NEED HELP WITH THE ALCOHOL. I WILL BE SERVING BEER, WINE AND MARGARITAS, WHICH I KNOW ALL OF THE GUESTS LIKE, BUT I DO NOT KNOW WHAT KIND OF BEER AND WINE TO BUY. I WOULD LIKE TO ACCOMODATE OUR GUESTS' PREFERENCES WITHOUT HAVING A TON OF LEFTOVERS THAT WE WILL NOT USE. IS IT RUDE OF ME TO ASK OUR GUESTS WHAT KIND OF BEER (BRAND, REGULAR OR LIGHT) AND WINE (PINOT GRIGIO, MERLOT OR OTHER) THEY PREFER? IF I CAN ASK THIS QUESTION OF OUR GUESTS, SHOULD I INCLUDE A NOTE IN THE INVITATION OR ASK THEM WHEN THEY RSVP?
THANK YOU SO MUCH!
Answer Dear Cecelia,
If the party is this important to you,by all means,send out save
the date cards. It might not keep the potential guests from changing
their vacation plans,but it will avoid the more casual 'if we had
known earlier..!' regrets.
It isn't rude of you to ask your guests what they prefer to drink,
but it isn't necessary,either. Simply have a selection that you think
will suit most tastes and leave it at that. If you start asking,you
may well get a host of special requests. "Fat Tire Sunshine Wheat,
please.." "Bird Island Rhubarb Wine would be great,thanks!"
If you still want to chance 60 different answers and enough left
overs for parties into the 2010s,you may say something to your future
guests when you get their RSVP.
