Social Etiquette and Good Manners/Death etiquette


My sister's brother in law recently passed away and I am unsure of proper etiquette regarding what to do next. The family isn't having a funeral or any other service, so we can't send flowers. The last time I saw this man was at my sisters wedding almost 35 years ago. I was friends with his sister when we were in highschool but him and I were never friends. I'm afraid to do the wrong thing and make people feel bad at this already devastating time. His parents, my brother in law(his brother), and his sister (the one I was friends with in hs) are all still alive. . Thank you for your time.

Dear Kat,
  Please write a note or send a card to whomever you feel would most benefit from
hearing from you. (The old friend sister and well as your sister and brother in law)
At a time like this,it is unlikely that anyone would be made more
upset by your gesture of comfort and support.

         Best regards,
         Amanda Gamble

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Amanda Gamble


I will answer any etiquette question you`d care to ask! I will be happy to give friendly non-judgmental advice on any situation. Certain cultures and religions that outside of my personal scope of knowledge but I usually know whom to ask when I have a question. Time specific questions may or may not get answered by your deadline.


I have been writing a daily etiquette advice column for 12 years. I have taught as well as given lectures on the subject.

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