About Fleming Allaire, Ph.D., a.k.a Dr. Manners (TM). Expertise As an author, educator, newspaper columnist and trainer in the field of manners and etiquette, I am able to answer questions on every aspect of social etiquette and good manners. I cover adult and children`s manners,introductions, dining skills, verbal and written communication (including e-mail, cell phone and regular telephone etiquette), tipping, weddings, travel, births, death and funerals, proper attire for every occasion, office etiquette, invitations, entertaining, the roles of a host and a guest, thank you notes, family life, interviews, gift-giving, graduations, good grooming, disabled persons, hotels,school manners, good sportsmanship,respect, manners in public places( the theater, movies, church, shopping, restaurants, etc.), being a good neighbor, and being considerate of others.
Experience I am the originator of national Children's Good Manners Month (September) and founder of The Good Manners Club. My school program "Manners Do Matter" is used successfully throughout the United States.
I teach manners and etiquette at the University of Connecticut, Central Connecticut State University, United Technologies Corporation, Cigna Corporation and The Archdiocese of Hartford Catholic Schools.
I wrote and recorded my Dr. Manners' Moments for Radio Disney, which aired for nearly two years. I was a regular contributor on WVIT-TV NBC30 during 2002 and 2003. I was a regular etiquette expert on WTIC (Radio)for nearly 3 years. I have been interviewed by radio stations, television stations, newspapers and other publications around the world. I recently appeared in an episode of the television show Survival Guide, on the Fine Living Network on Personal Etiquette and am a consultant for the Network. I was asked to write an article for The New York Times on Manners and Etiquette for the Summer, which was published on Sunday, May 16, 2004.
I have visited dozens of schools, public and private; worked with The Girl Scouts; various community groups (including Chambers of Commerce and Senior Citizen Groups); church groups,and more.
I am a former elementary school principal and a former elementary school teacher.
Additionally, I have authored several books and booklets on manners and etiquette.
I have been a manners advice newspaper columnist for nine years.
My education includes:
Ph.D. in Education, LaSalle University;
Administrator Certification, Sacred Heart University;
Teacher Certification, Central Connecticut State University;
B.A. in English, Nazareth College of Rochester;
Etiquette Consultant Certification
Expert: Fleming Allaire, Ph.D., a.k.a Dr. Manners (TM). - 8/14/2004
Question I work in a large resort hotel as a foodserver. I have worked in a fine dining establishment where dinners are finished tableside i.e. Steak Dianne, chateau briande, caesar salads and ect. In this environment we used the peppermill on the guiridon, but now all dishes are completed in the kitchen under the auspices of a master chef.
My question concerns the use of a peppermill at the table. In french service we are to serve from the left and clear from the right. Plated service is served and cleared from the right. Our dining room managers who have never served anything but plated food are insisting that the peppermill be served from the left. I think that it is less obtrusive to serve fresh ground pepper from the right. This keeps elbows from the guest's face and does not force the patron to move their body away from the server. After explaining this to my younger managers I still serve my pepper from the right but all of the new servers are still being told to offer and serve pepper from the left. If this is proper etiquette I shall defer to your judgement and begin serving from the left. But if I am right I would like to show your answer to my managers.
Finally, I would like to say that I have 30 years experience in serving food and the hotel management asks me to train most of the younger staff. In fact most of my superiors trailed me when they were learning the trade. Last year 2 coworkers and I wrote the SOPs for the main dining room, banquets, and coctail parties at the hotel's insistence.
I am anxiously awaiting your reply.
Sincerely,
David Fawcett
Answer Dear Mr. Fawcett,
There is no question that food should be served from the left and removed from the right, even for plated service. Rolls, gravy, dressing and condiments should also rotate counterclockwise. However, beverages should be served from the right, due to the placement of the glasses. It would be much too awkward to reach across the guest to fill a water goblet, wine glass or pour a hot beverage. Thus bringing your question about the peppermill to the forefront. I do agree with you that it is less cumbersome and more manageable for the server to grind the pepper from the right side. The guest will be watching to tell the server when to stop, so by grinding on the right side the server's right arm will not be flapping in the guest's face. It is much more practical for the guest and server. There is less likelihood of a mishap, and that is very important, as you well know from your many years of experience.
Thank you for writing.
Best regards,
Fleming Allaire, Ph.D.
"Dr. Manners"
