Question My son's K program is a disaster. He has made no progress. My son is trained but I was still afraid he might not go somewhere new so before school started, I took him to the bathroom there and explained not to apply alot of pressure and he was going. One day he stopped. No one informed me. In fact, they left him for a full day for days assuming he didn't have to go because he said he didn't. Even though they give him alot of water. I saw my son holding his crotch at school and only when I inquired did they acknowledge the issue. My son then refused to go at a friend's house. No one told me what might have happened. He doesn't have a good relationship with his aide who takes him to the restroom and the school is married to her. The school claimed to have resolved this problem even though it was a disaster out of the blue at my friend's house (and he adores her). Then the same thing happened, i noticed him rushing to the bathroom when coming home and AGAIN I had to ask. At that point I was told we needed to talk. TWO times they ignored him not using the restroom all day for days, cementing the habit. My son is now acting out in the bathroom at home saying he doesn't have to pee, never did this, deliberately missing the toilet when he does. THey want me to fix this problem or implement a plan again, even though their plan didn't work. He was going fine, he wouldn't just flip for no reason. I think it's monstrous that twice they ignored such a critical thing and I can't leave him in school like this. Add to this that no progress is being made. I could use any advice. I'm so upset. It's not fair for me to have to retrain him and I don't think I can do it halfway if he dislikes school this much and if they would ignore him not going for days more than once, as if to think if they don't say it, it isn't happening. I am so very distressed and resentful. I am doing so much with my son at home and they are just creating serious problems for me.
Answer The only thing that I have seen that works in a situation like this is to put the child on a "bathroom schedule." We worked with our nurse as a part of the team and created a time where he would be taken to the bathroom, then escorted back to class after he does his business. The key is to put no pressure on him, but provide opportunity based upon when he would normally need to go. Your physician is really the only one who can tell you if it is a physical problem, so I would rule that out, then ask for an IEP meeting with the nurse present. I would put the bathroom schedule in the IEP or a Health Plan if you have one.
I have spent nealy 40 years in the area of Special Education. I have had the pleasure of teaching pre-school, elementary, middle, high school and college levels, as well as, served in school district administration buildings in classroom/legal support positions. I have also spent some time working in a State Department of Education Exceptional Student Services Office and am now currently Division Head and Director of Institutional Research at Alice Lloyd College in Pippa Passes, Kentucky. I also teach special education classes on campus. I have also taught full time teacher preparation at Northern Arizona University on the Tucson Campus, Seattle Pacific University, and at the University of Wyoming in Laramie, Wyoming. In addition to that I have taught adjunct at Seattle Pacific University, City University in Seattle, Ashford University, and Grand Canyon University.
I have experienced directly special education legal issues, process and procedure, and have taught at all levels in every special education category except gifted. My major expertise is diagnostic prescriptive teaching, literacy as it relates to disabilities, technology in special education, and Educational Leadership. My greatest passion in the field is building new programs, implementing and doing the research to see how they work. My Dissertation and principle research interest is in the area of inclusive education, primarily co-teaching of students with disabilities in the general education classroom.
Organizations Council for Exceptional Children, Association for the Supervision of Curriculum, National Reading Council.
Publications Teaching Exceptional Children, Published computer assisted instruction, titled PAL, Special Education Basics, college Textbook, Teaching with Precision, college Textbook, Various devotionals at the website, Preachitteachit.com.
Education/Credentials I have a B.A. in Secondary Education, a Masters in Special Education (cross categorical), administrative certification, and a second B.A. in Elementary Education. I completed my doctorate in Educational Leadership at Northern Arizona University.
Awards and Honors Best Summer Program in the Nation (Honorable Mention, when I was Teaching)
Multiple local awards