AboutKindred Beisinger Expertise I am able to answer questions regarding dating, courtship, and marriage after divorce. I feel equipped to address questions and comments regarding old baggage and past mistakes. I can also answer questions pertaining to blended families and step-children. I can not answer questions that involve manipulating the partners behavior or outlook.
Experience I am a minister that teaches and counsels G-d's instruction for stable relationships. My husband and I have both been married before. I have worked with battered women and facilitated groups for men with anger issues. As a minister, I have officiated several weddings in the past decade, with only one resulting in divorce.
Expert: Kindred Beisinger Date: 6/23/2008 Subject: does he really love me like I love him
Question Im 19 and I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year and a half. Im a freak clingly to him. Lately every once in a while he just completly ignores me, well not completly its just that he promises to call and then doesn't or when he does its like 3 in the morning and hes all like I can only talk for a few coz im really tired.
Everytime I mention going to go over his house to see him he always has something else better to do. I've been trying to take advice from everyone. I've eveny tryed the whole withholding sex (which I really don't feel any woman should have to do) which turned out to be a bust coz I can't help myself he's just so damn sexy.
Its like the only time were together we have sex and then its all back to him getting his way, bossing me around or treating me like shit infront of his friends. The only time he acts like the guy I want to spend my life with when its just me and him alone. Also I've tryed to eliminate these problems by suggesting that he should move out with me, but he's just like no I can't leave now my family needs me which I can completly understand if it wasn't for the fact that he's always saying that he's going to move out with his best friend in a few months.
Im so confused
What should I do?
Please help
Answer Dear Celeste,
What you have told me is just one more reason I do not believe in pre-marital sex. The relationship can very easily be reduced to getting together to have sex without any commitment on the part of one or both of the partners. As far as your question goes, I think he's not ready for commitment, whether or not that relates to the degree of love he has, I can't say, but he's not interested in commitment. I can tell you one other thing you might want to consider. A clingy person is usually very hard to deal with for the partner that is not clingy. A clingy partner is quite confining, almost suffocating, so if I were you, I'd deal with the issue causing that and see if he doesn't get a bit less distant and evasive. I don't know how old he is, but you are 19. I'd recommend that you address the clinginess and go from where that takes you. If it's meant to be with this guy, it will work out and if it isn't, no amount of hanging on, will change that.
Free yourself up from within and see where that leaves you and how you feel about the relationship, then.
Kind Regards,
Kindred
www.eingedi.us
