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You are here: Experts > People/Relationships > Marriage > How to Strengthen Your Relationship > Please help
Expert: Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger - 10/24/2009
Question
My girlfriend recently wanted a break from our relationship. It lasted 8 months and now we've been back together for a little over a month now and I'm having trouble trusting her when she hangs out with guys. Actually its just one guy, a friend she watches movies with or eats or whatever. The trust is a seperate issue but I'm wondering, now that we're back together should I meet the guy? I mean, in a relationship do you normally have seperate friends that the other doesn't know at all? Or do your friends become "our" friends. Not like I would hang out with him alone or anything but should iat least know him and maybe hang out all of us together or what? I'm confused. I would appreciate your advice. Thank you for reading.
Answer
Dear Joshua,
The fact that your girl friend wanted a break for a lengthy period of time would understandably raise questions for you. I think you should just be honest with her and tell her you aren't sure how to handle this. I had a number of men friends when I started dating my husband and I introduced them as it was convenient. As we got more serious, it just became known that my life had changed. My old friends became our friends and my "hang out together because we're single friends" moved on. I don't know for sure what to recommend to you, other than an open honest discussion with your girl friend and tell her you just don't know what you are supposed to do or feel. How does she want you to handle it? Then when she gives you her answer, you can decide if it's something you want to deal with or just move on and go your separate ways.
I hope this gets sorted out for you. I think you need to remember, you are supposed to feel comfortable in a relationship, and if you don't, you don't have to stay.
Kind Regards,
KD Liz
www.eingedi.us
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