Expert: Kindred Beisinger penname K D Elizabeth Beisinger - 10/19/2009

Question
Me and my boyfriend have gone out for two years, we broke up twice and got back together. We have a long distance relationship and we see each other every 5 months or so. Every time we speak on the phone we always get in an argument and end up mad at each other. He tell's me that he love's me but i feel that he doesn't, I'm wondering why he doesn't call me at times and why he doesn't trust me? I'm always wanting to call him and see how and what he's doing, always' thinking about him. When I'm with him it seems like nothing in this world matters but to be with him. I need to know if I'm in love or this is just an obsession? Also, it hurts when i think of him with another girl and knowing that he's gonad eventually get married and have kid's. please answer my question's i will really apreciate it.


Answer
Dear Carmen,
Since you asked directly, I will answer, directly.  It really sounds more like an obsession than a loving relationship.  You mention a great number of negative emotions and interaction in this relationship and it is not necessarily love, just because you don't want him to be with someone else.  As a matter of fact that's really indicative of a pretty unhealthy relationship.  In healthy relationships, a person wants to be happy and for the other person to be happy.  It sounds like he is not as vested in this relationship as you are.  Let him make the next call and see where that goes.  
I wish you well.
Kind Regards,
KD Liz
www.eingedi.us