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Question My partner is currently out of work and is on antidepressants as he has suffered from depression since having a serious head injury a few years ago. He currently seems to be distant, although he does talk and have fun, and gives lots of hugs and kisses, however, he seems to have gone off sex and this is having a huge effect on my self confidence.
He says it isn't me, but him. He hadn't been to the gym in a while and put on a few (7) lbs. He says he doesn't feel as good about himself and thats whats wrong. I wonder if this is the case, or am I just not seeing the writing on the wall?
Answer Hello Lynda,
From what you say, your bf has some serious problems he is dealing with right now and truly needs help. If his counselor is not helping him that much then he needs to get other help. Loss of sex drive is part of depression. If he is still affectionate when he can be and still functions it is because he can hold himself together for short periods of time.
He really, really needs exercise, as that helps his brain.
I have a suggestion. If he had a head injury he may need a good chiropractor that does soft manipulation or a spinal touch type therapy. He could be out of whack in his neck and upper spine that contributes to his problem, or it might just take time to heal.
In any case, I would not take it personally. He has some problems and needs help. Anti-depressants only mask the problem and he needs someone that understands that and will work with him at the cause, which might be both physical and emotional.
I do hope he gets the help he needs. I would hang in there awhile. If someone refuses to get help over a period of time, however, then you might have to move on, but I would go to counseling with him sometimes so that you can get help in coping with this, too.
That is my suggestion. Feel free to respond again.
