How to Strengthen Your Relationship/Need Help

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Question
My girlfriend of nearly 5 years (this December) told me the other night that she's not in love with me anymore.  She said that she still loves me but the "butterfly feeling is gone".  We're still together, and plan on staying together (for the foreseeable future), but I want to know if there's anyway I can have her fall in love with me again.  I'm so in love with her, that I can't even picture life without her.  Any advice you can give will be a great help.  Thank you.

Answer
Hi James,

Over the course of time people fall in and out of love and back.  Often the excitement of the infatuation, the exploration, the newness will wane.  Stronger more lasting love replace this early passion.

You can do some things to rekindle that passion.  Remember the things you were doing back when you first fell in love.  How did you behave towards her?  Start by upping the affection level.  Show her that you love her and want her.  Usually it is the small actions that make the most impact.  A smile when you see her, a gentle touch, small romantic gestures.  Has your life become too routine? Boring?  Find some new things to do, go places, do things together for the fun of it.  Now for sex,  is that becoming predictable?  Shake it up a little.  Try new positions, times, places.  Find out if there are any things she wants to try.  

Make sure you find time to be romantic with out rush and interruptions.

I hope this helps.

Tom Blair
Relationship Coach

How to Strengthen Your Relationship

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Tom Blair

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Published author. Questions related to strengthening and saving relationships and marriages. Sex coaching questions. Questions related to mature singles re-entering the dating world after a death of a spouse or a divorce.

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Neural Linguistic Practitioner Hypnotherapist Sexual Relationship Coach Internationally read author. Retired Educator All relationships are based on having certain needs being met. Healthy relationships are ones where there is a mutual meeting of these needs. Respect, honesty, communication are just some of those needs When those needs and others are not being met, the relationship will fall into disrepair. Together we will identify those needs and work to correct the imbalance. It is not too late, love can be rekindled. And it can last a life time.

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Neural Linguistic Practitioner Hypnotherapist Sexual Relationship Coach Internationally read author. Retired Educator

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