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How to Strengthen Your Relationship/Is he getting disinterested in me?


We've been together on and off for a little over a year. He breaks up, and tells me he doesn't know what he wants, then get back together a few weeks to a month later. He keeps in contact texting me everyday, even during the break ups. Last time we got back together he told me he wants to be with me forever. He talked about moving in or getting a place together and getting married sometime after my divorce is final. Well it's been a couple months now, and  we only see each other a couple days out of the week. I know hes busy at work, and feeling a bit frustrated living with his roommate, but I feel like he's distancing himself from me. He says he gets lazy and tired in winter and that we are ok. I can't help but feel due to the distancing, and not seeing each other much, that he's ready to break up again. Is this unfounded? Is he jerking me around?

Hi Sherrie

If a guy breaks up with you once, well maybe it is a mistake.  But multiple times it is a message.  You are telling him that it is OK for him to treat you that way.  And he is telling you that he is not really that into you. You need to ask yourself, "Do I want a this kind of relationship?"  If you are good with being treated with so little respect, just lay down and be his door mat.  I doubt that you are really that kind of woman.  So it is ultimatum time.  If he wants back he must know that you will be his priority or you will be gone.

Any healthy relationship needs respect and honesty to be cornerstones.  Unless you are getting that from him, the affection, communication, companionship and sex will not lead to a lasting loving relationship.  If you are not getting theses needs met and are not meeting them for him, I doubt the relationship will last.

Good luck,

How to Strengthen Your Relationship

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Tom Blair


Published author. Questions related to strengthening and saving relationships and marriages. Sex coaching questions. Questions related to mature singles re-entering the dating world after a death of a spouse or a divorce.


Neural Linguistic Practitioner Hypnotherapist Sexual Relationship Coach Internationally read author. Retired Educator All relationships are based on having certain needs being met. Healthy relationships are ones where there is a mutual meeting of these needs. Respect, honesty, communication are just some of those needs When those needs and others are not being met, the relationship will fall into disrepair. Together we will identify those needs and work to correct the imbalance. It is not too late, love can be rekindled. And it can last a life time.

Neural Linguistic Practitioner Hypnotherapist Sexual Relationship Coach Internationally read author. Retired Educator

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