How to Strengthen Your Relationship/my boyfriend changes a lot


here is my story, i have been with my boyfriend for a year we are not living together but we are sexually active and our sexual life is really good but the rest of the relationship is very confusing. we see each other once a week sometimes not and we are living in the same city, he never calls or texts just to check on me or send me a good morning message, he will text just to arrange a meeting or something like that. when it comes to sweet words or showing love it is me doing it all the time but really rarely from his part when for example i say '' i love you'' he says it back once in a while but never take the initiative to say it first...he doesn't remember the special occasions or anything... it is been really a while ago since we went out together partying but he goes every week with his friends. lately i discovered without him knowing that there are loads of text messages and facebook messages between him and a girl that he never mentioned to me. all this is getting me worry about his love for me i love him and i want to be with him but he doesn't show any interest. what shall i do?

Hi Souka,

Let's understand what the relationship you have is.   You are his booty call.  You are not his girl friend.  You are not even his friend.  You are his piece of ass.  Too harsh?

Think about what a boy friend - girl friend relationship is.  As a couple you spend quality time together.   You date.  You have mutual friends that you hang out with.  Sex is a part of the relationship but not the entirety of it.  Friends, even friend with benefits, care enough about one another to see each other when sex is not the purpose.  Friends care about one another.  

The bigger question is why are you interested in this relationship?  Why do you settle?  I am a believer in hypnosis to help folks restructure their self image and to make better decisions.  Here is a program that I recommend.
Find your soulmate

Good luck.  You can do better.

How to Strengthen Your Relationship

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Tom Blair


Published author. Questions related to strengthening and saving relationships and marriages. Sex coaching questions. Questions related to mature singles re-entering the dating world after a death of a spouse or a divorce.


Neural Linguistic Practitioner Hypnotherapist Sexual Relationship Coach Internationally read author. Retired Educator All relationships are based on having certain needs being met. Healthy relationships are ones where there is a mutual meeting of these needs. Respect, honesty, communication are just some of those needs When those needs and others are not being met, the relationship will fall into disrepair. Together we will identify those needs and work to correct the imbalance. It is not too late, love can be rekindled. And it can last a life time.

Neural Linguistic Practitioner Hypnotherapist Sexual Relationship Coach Internationally read author. Retired Educator

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