How to Strengthen Your Relationship/A New Interest


I recently started talking to a new girl and she's perfect. She's my type and everything. However, her past is bothering me and I'm afraid it'll cause problems. She flat out, laughingly told me she lost her virginity because she was "sorta raped" (her words). When talking about a relationship, she acted like they weren't worth it. Because of my work schedule, I won't see her till the end of the month but she's excited about it. I like her a lot but she distrusts guys. I know her being raped was not her fault and I would never tell her that. I want her to know that she can trust me and I would never hurt her like her past relationships did.

Hello Quinn,

The problem is that you do not really know her well enough to know if she is perfect for you or not. That is what dating is for, to see if you are compatible and to see how they treat you and others. People usually put on a good show at first, when they date and then later on the real person comes out.

The key here is don't borrow trouble until it shows up. Just go ahead and date her and get to know her without making a judgment at this time. Time will tell if her past brings problems, or if other things come up that causes problems. Without saying anything to her, she will soon know if she can trust you or not.  Just enjoy her company until issues, if any, come up- and then deal with one thing at a time.  

Be polite and respectful of her, and then pretty soon you will know if you two will really make a good team.

I wish you the best.

How to Strengthen Your Relationship

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Sharon Crandall


Over 30 years of working with individuals, families, and businesses. Teaching classes, private coaching--helping design individual life plans,, private personality assessment, group workshops, and training others to become Personality Consultants and Life Coaches.

Certified in two year program of Personality Science. Certified in secondary Personality Science program from a different institution. Trained in various workshops for Life Coaching, Self-educated from numerous books and programs, plus private training from Personality Science experts.

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Hundreds of people from all walks of life including private individuals, couples, families, and businesses--from homemakers to CEO's Worked with many groups in workshops and classes. Worked with businesses particularly in customer relations/service and sales.

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