AboutSandi Expertise I can answer most types of question dealing with teens and preteens. I can give advice on dating, love, sex, friendships, same sex relationships. I am experienced at most preteen & teen subjects and have given advice to many people before. Who better to give advice to teens as being one myself?
Experience I'm a teen girl and have been in many relationships, both with guys and girls. I've been in many different situations and can give you great advice.
Expert: Sandi Date: 2/23/2008 Subject: I am lost...
Question
I am in a bit of a problem here and I hope you can help me. Theres this girl
Mariah who I met through one of my classes this year in highschool. We began to
talk and quickly fell for eachother. After a few months time I asked her out and
she eagerly said Yes. Things were absolutely amazing, she would always call me
and I would call her. She was always happy so see me, always smiling and she
would tell me how amazing of a guy I was. I mean, she would always put time
aside each day and ask for me to stop by and say hi for a litle each day when we
couldn't hang out that day. It was this way for a few months. I fell in love
with her deeply and I am still in love with her. However, things began to turn
on me. She started to talk less to me, and she would have an attitude most of the time.
It worried me so much that one day after a week of this happening, I asked her
what was going on. She told me that everything I was doing was making her mad,
like when I would ask her what was wrong when she acted strange. She told me she
needed space but wasn't clear on what that ment. So I told her I would give her
space for a while, but I wasn't sure what to do so I would still see her in
school to say hi but we didn't really talk out of school. This went on for a
week and a half. THen we hung out during the weekend after I gave her space and
things went pretty good, we watched a movie and hung out. The spark was there,
everything. Yet the next day she still didn't really talk to me and for the rest
of the weekend. So I asked her again what was going on and why she wasn't
talking to me and she told me that I needed to calm down and give her her space
still. So I did for the next week to two weeks. On valentines day we hung out and things went better again, as if nothing happened. I mean, like it was in
the very biggining. I was so happy again things were amazing, she told me I was
perfect and the most amazing guy she could ever ask for. She even made a picture
frame of us and gave it to me. But then a few days later the same thing
happened. I was hurting so bad this time that I gave her a deadline to make up
her mind because she said she didn't know what she wanted. So I was so desperate
I told her on a tuesday that she had until thursday to make up her mind or else
it would be over. She didn't say a word to me until wednesday night when I
infact broke up with her. I had no sign things would get better yet I didnt want
to break up with her but I thought that by giving a deadline it would snap her
back into reality and figure things out. Well I broke up with her and then after
that she told me she was sorry for hurting me so much and she wishes she could
take it back but that it is for the best shes starting to think. She told me she always cared about me, that she still does, and that she always will. And
that is how it ended. I was a wreck, I still am. She is on my mind all the time,
I break down almost every night when I think about the good times we shared. I
adore her, I love her so much and I can't except defeat over this, I need to
change things but how. Yesterday, her bestfriend talked to me in school and told
me that she was upset because she thought I was over it and happy. WHich I am
not, but it showed that she still cares about me. I heard she was upset about
all of this happening. Yet she told me that it was for the best. I don't know
what to do I feel like I am running out of time, I need to do something to get
her back. She was the best thing that ever happened to me and I don't want to
lose her. She also told me by the way, that when she gets into a relationship
too far, that she begins to pick out all of the negative aspects and dwell on
them until it ruins things. What do I do? I am so lost...
Please help me and thank you so much,
Mike
I forgot to mention that her and I talk now once a day for a half hour or so as
friends. It has been a week since the breakup. SHe still wants to talk to me,
she made me promise that I would still talk to her. But I want things to go back
to the way they were. I miss her so much, I need to do something before it's too
late
Answer i am of the believe that when two people have such strong feelings for each other and then they break up, you really need to have some time away from her. i know you think she is the only girl for you and is your one true love. but it really sounds like she just is not ready to date anyone. she needs to grow up. and you need to not talk or see her for some time until you are over her. go out with other people. get your mind off of her. if you talk to her daily that is not helping! :) hope this helps and please write back if you want to talk more
