AboutRyan Expertise I can answer questions about long distance relationships, high school/college relationships, crushes, jealousy, heart break, love at a young age, sex at a young age and talking about marriage when you're in your teens. I can also help if your parents dissaprove of your bf/gf. I know all the lingo, I know Facebook, IMing, MySpace, etc., so hearing these words won't be new to me.
Experience I have been through numerous relationships, long distance relationships, and loving ones. I know how to handle every situation in the manner it should be.
Education/Credentials In college for engineering, have taken numerous psychology/sociology classes in college, as well as having a mother who is a psychiatrist.
Expert: Ryan Date: 5/27/2008 Subject: Please help if you can
Question Wow I don't know where to start.Well I guess I could start out by saying that I'm 18 years old.I met this guy named Josh when I was 13,he was 15.He was down in Florida for the summer with his mother because she lived there.He lived in Texas with his father though.Little did I know that he was drug user.He smoked pot,took pills but I still loved him anyways.His mother was a pothead and so was his father and his brother.He hung out with the worst people.We went out for that 2 months and then he had to leave to go back to Texas and we had a long distance relationship until December.The long distance relationship just didn't work out.Then the following summer,he came back down to Florida and we got back together and he stayed there.We had a lot of good times and he treated me nice.Even one time,my dogs attacked me(long story) and he was there holding ice on my wounds.Really the only main problem was his drug using.He often forgot to call me when he said that he was going to.He went to high school with me but he barely went to school each day so he ended up dropping out in 9th grade.Then me,my mom and my sister all moved to Texas(where he lived) in October.It was all good at first because it was a new thing that we were in town and he showed us around and all that good stuff.Then he started to slack off because he was with his friends alot partying and smoking.We broke up when he didn't call me for 2 weeks so I called him and his stepmom told me that he was out with another girl and that he wanted to break up but didn't want to tell me.I was so upset.So me,my mom and sis went over to the house and the stepmom and father beat me,my mom and sister up.It was horrible.They are druggies and they are messed up.We told the cops but they didn't do anything about it.The cops were scared of the whole family in that town because they were messed up and crazy.So we left Texas a few months later and moved up to North Carolina.I got an email from him a few months later and he wanted to get back with me and he said that he was sorry and all this stuff and that he loved me.We would talk for about a few days and then he would just not call anymore and i wouldn't hear anything from him again until a few months later.This has happened the past few years now on and off every few months.The last time I talked to him was in October and we talked once on the phone and then he never called again.He always said that he would move up to NC to be with me but he never did.I was always hurt by him.His actions never went with his words.He is a pothead,smoking weed and doing pills as far as I know.He lives off of his mother and father moving from Texas to Florida.Now just recently,I heard from his best friend that he was in the army.This had me confused because I was wondering how he could get into the Army being a druggie and with no GED.On his myspace,his display name is that he is an american soldier.He hasn't been online in a while,since april 2nd and I sent him a friend request asking him if he is really in the Army.He hasn't gotten it yet because he hasn't been online but my problem is whether I should keep my friend request going to him or cancel it.I don't know if he is really in the Army.I mean,it sounds like it but it's just weird.I can't see him quitting his drugs,he was addicted.His best friend says that he is stationed in Missouri.I don't know what to do.I don't want to seem like I'm begging to him by sending him a friend request on myspace.Maybe he really has changed his life and is getting better and that would be good but IDK.I don't know if it would ever work out between us because of his parents(I could never like them again because of what they did).I hope this all makes sense.I need advice badly.Please help the bes that you can.Thanks so much.
Answer Charley,
Your situation is very complicated. It seems that this is not the type of person you want to be associated with. It is obvious he and his family have huge problems, and have gotten you involved.
He seems like he is no good, and will do nothing but cause you more and more problems if you ever do talk to him again. I'd cut off communication, meaning the MySpace thing. As hard as it is, you need to let go. It's too much drama to handle, drama you don't need at all.
I know me telling you that is hard to hear, and you're most likely feeling that you'll never be able to get over him. However, you will. Think of it this way; you need someone in your life who will put in as much effort as you are. He puts in slight effort, then doesn't, and he's terribly unreliable.
So, as far as my opionion, I'd say to try and forget about it. You deserve someone much better.
