AboutRyan Expertise I can answer questions about long distance relationships, high school/college relationships, crushes, jealousy, heart break, love at a young age, sex at a young age and talking about marriage when you're in your teens. I can also help if your parents dissaprove of your bf/gf. I know all the lingo, I know Facebook, IMing, MySpace, etc., so hearing these words won't be new to me.
Experience I have been through numerous relationships, long distance relationships, and loving ones. I know how to handle every situation in the manner it should be.
Education/Credentials In college for engineering, have taken numerous psychology/sociology classes in college, as well as having a mother who is a psychiatrist.
Expert: Ryan Date: 6/11/2008 Subject: Boyfriend possibly joining the US Navy
Question Okay, so my boyfriend is seriously considering joining the Navy. I am 17,
going into my senior year of high school. My boyfriend is 18 and he just
graduated from high school, and isn't going to college. At least not right now.
I met him on May 23 at a concert I organized. He's friends with the band who
I'm pretty good friends with. We barely talked that night, and he lived 2 hours
away, but the next day I added him on myspace and eventually got his phone
number and started talking a lot. He officially asked me out on June 3. So
yeah, we haven't been going out long at all. But we both feel like we know
each other pretty damn well. We've been talking on the phone a ton since
May 23, at least 3 hours a day. Sometimes even up to 8 hours. The lease on
his house was up, so he had to move to another state at the end of May,
making it even more difficult to hang out with him. Keep in mind that we still
haven't hung out.
So he had brought up the idea of joining the Navy a few times to me, and
every time, I'd pretty much told him that I wouldn't be happy with that. His
original plan was to move out here in July and live with his grandma. Then he
would get a job here and be able to see me as well as live in his favorite city.
So we thought that was definitely going to happen until today, when his mom
talked his grandma out of letting him stay with her. He tells me his mom is
pretty psycho and wants him to live with her. So he feels that the only way he
can move away from where he is now, which he wants to do even if we weren't
going out, is to join the Navy so he can get money as well as travel.
I just don't know if I can deal with him joining the Navy. As of right now, I
really do want to be with him, but I'm not sure how I'm going to deal with not
seeing him. We HAVE only been going out for a week now, and even though
we both feel like it's gotten pretty serious and we really do want to pursue
this, but I'm not sure how much is going to change in the next few months.
He doesn't want me to feel tied down, and I really don't either. He's already
asked me a few times today if I want to break up. It's not that I WANT to
break up with him, it's just that I don't know how serious of a relationship
this is. Is it even worth staying together over if he's only going to be able to
come here for a month in July, then leave, maybe come back another month
in the fall, and then leave for the Navy?
Aren't I too young to be thinking about settling down now? I'm just not sure.
Answer Mollie,
You really need to look deep down inside, and ask yourself if all this can be done. Long distance is hard, and having a bf/gf overseas is even harder.
You don't want to be tied down, and neither does he, so you need to think about that, too.
It may not be the perfect time for you two, and I know, it's hard to hear. You both have a lot on your plate, and it will be even more stressful in the next few month/year.
So, I'd say to wait until he comes to visit, and talk things out with him. It's always easier in person, you can say what's on your mind. This will give you both a good gauge as to how it's going to be. Hang in there.
