About James Expertise I can answer most questions on dating from male or female perspective, straight or gay as i believe every person goes through the same problems in life but on different scales.
Experience I've always given people advice, its something i'm good at, i'm gay and have been with my boyfriend for 3 years,i don't think our relationships perfect but its healthy. I give my female friends advice and they say i'm good because i'm honest, its not always the thing they want to hear but in the end it makes for happiness. My relationship started out long distance and we now live together, so i can give personal advice on a lot of issues which i have dealt with. I'm a nice, polite guy and i'm applying as i really want to help people with personal issues.
Education/Credentials well i attended and passed secondary school (high school) but apart from that its just the school of life, i feel i naturally understand and relate to people, something no education could get you.
Expert: James Date: 6/29/2008 Subject: Boyfriends mum dont want us to be together
Question ive been seeing my boyfriend now for about 4 months, im 17 and hes 20, and to be honest we both know what we want, we're happy, love each other and things wont change. The problem is his mum. at the beginning everything was going fine, things changed after the first time i stayed at his house, since then all she does is moan about me/us. shes even thown him down the stairs, hits him etc... he isn't in contact with his dad and doesn't want to be, i understand that. now ive just recieved a text sayin that shes started off at him again about us and want to have a go at me next time she sees me. she isn't part of this relationship but she really dus seem 2 start becoming part of it! i really dont know what to do anymore, i dont want this splitting us up. Its hard moving out, im happy at home everythings fine and he says he cant afford a place of his own, where as i think/know he can but maybe he's scared to leave?
i really need some advice on this, i know if she says anything i wouldn't be able to keep my mouth shut, but then it'll more than likely make things 10 times worse.
why cant she just be happy for us? my parents are fine, and if he could get to work and back every day he could stay with me.. but cant.
i really dont know how much longer i can do this for.
please get back to me.. thanks
Answer Julie,
I'm not sure why his mum is being like this, it could be that she feels as though she's losing him, or to be honest she may have taken a disliking to you. Either way physical abuse really isn't ok, he should talk to her discuss, without arguing, about how things between you two aren't going to change and he just wants things to be calm and civil, i feel an agreement should be made as nobody wants to live in a warzone apart from that i can't really say much, this is more a problem between your boyfriend and his mother instead of a personal issue. I'm sorry if this hasn't helped a lot but i think if you suggest this to your boyfriend it should help the situation a little.
Best wishes
James
x
Really happy they've talked, maybe now you should make an extra effort to suck up, i hate my boyfriends mum but i fake it to keep things calm, probably not the right thing to do but it seems to work ;), also hope this helps a little.
