About Ryan Expertise I can answer questions about long distance relationships, high school/college relationships, crushes, jealousy, heart break, love at a young age, sex at a young age and talking about marriage when you're in your teens. I can also help if your parents dissaprove of your bf/gf. I know all the lingo, I know Facebook, IMing, MySpace, etc., so hearing these words won't be new to me.
Experience I have been through numerous relationships, long distance relationships, and loving ones. I know how to handle every situation in the manner it should be.
Education/Credentials In college for engineering, have taken numerous psychology/sociology classes in college, as well as having a mother who is a psychiatrist.
Question QUESTION: my girlfriend had started going out with me when i was getting abused at my moms. my councilor says I'm so attached to her because she was there to help me through this time. she says she loves me more than anything and never wants to leave me. so when she comes over to my house i was sliding my hand down the front of her shorts when we were making out and she kept pulling my hand up slowly. and when i asked her why she said just wait. and she says she wont do anything like that with me cause she doesn't want to be a whore. how do i finger her? i told her she wasn't a whore. help!
ANSWER: Spencer,
You need to give her time. When she says she doesn't want to be a whore, she doesn't mean she is, but that she'll feel like it because she doesn't want it to happen, and you do. She's just not ready right now, and you have to respect her wishes. When she is ready, she'll let you know.
-Ryan
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QUESTION: thank you so much i just does not want her to think we were moving to slow. and she even told me that patients will do the trick. but i have another question. i always have doubts about are relationship and when i stop and think about it she should have doubts and she doesn't. i just hate when she even looks at boys, or boys look at her. is their anything i can do to stop these doubts?
Answer Hello again, Spencer,
Patience is key, she is correct about that.
She has no doubts because she may have more faith and trust in your relationship than you. You were abused by your mother, and it may have hurt the trust you need to give to people, which is normal.
There's nothing you can do about other guys looking at her. If you try to intervene, it will come across as you being insecure, and it will turn her off even more. In a relationship, trust is the most important thing. Try talking to her. Tell her you do trust her, but you feel a little weird when she looks at guys, and vice versa.
