Expert: Deborah - 9/9/2009

Question
I'm 15 years old, 16 in November. A few months ago I got really drunk at a party and had unprotected sex with a guy. I found out about 8 weeks later I was pregnant. Abortion was not an option and I decided to go on with the pregnancy. I've had tummy pains all throughout the pregnancy but avoided doctors as much as possibly cause I don't really like them. I was drinking and smoking a lot in the first 8 weeks of pregnancy when I didn't know I had fallen pregnant. Anyway, 4 days ago I gave birth to a stillborn boy. I've been a little depressed during pregnancy but I was able to cope with it but now that I've lost the only joy I had I'm finding it too hard. I was just wondering if you would be able to give me some advice on what I could do. Thank you so much!


Answer
Dear Jess,

Oh my heart aches for you.  I hope you don't mind talking to me back and forth for a little bit, so that we can really figure this out and get you happy again.


First of all, let's go back in time before you got pregnant.  Were you and are you living at home with both of your parents?  What is your relationship with them like?  Do you have brothers and sisters?  How do you get along with them, if you have any?

What is your school like?  Do you enjoy it or are you struggling?  Do you have many friends or just a few close friends, or no friends?  What are the kids like in your school?

What do you enjoy outside of school, or extra-curricular activities after school?  For example, do you play on any teams, go to dance class, ride horse, etc., ?

Write back,

Deb