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About Jonathan
Expertise
I have dealt with many young people in a teaching environment as well as in teaching young people at tennis clinics. Since younger people have seen so little of the world their view of the world should not be shaped by the confines of what happens within their family unit. Its natural to be shy about developing relationships outside the home but young people need to know the other person is also probably just as shy as they are. If you havea problem then remember you are in good company. There are no new problems. Someone else has also had the same problem. If you need ideas on how to handle them or some choices to consider feel free to ask. I will answer questions about moral issues and how to handle such issues when they come up in your life. Continue reading about the issue of bullies which can be physical, emotional or sexual as well as bullies who use the internet to spread stories about you. You do not have to be teenager to ask a question here on how to handle this. If you are a pre-teen or tween you may also ask a question here.

Experience
I have taught children from 7th through 12th grade. It is all too common for young people to be shy or hesistate because they fear rejection from someone of the opposite sex. You do not have to be a teenager to ask a question here. If you are a pre-teen or "tween" as is commonly used now and are being "bullied" by someone and bullies can be other kids who hit you or as is becoming more common sexual bullying by name calling or spreading stories about you feel free to ask a question about what to do about it. There is also cyber bullying by people who may know you and there can be people who are pretending to be someone they are not who may insult you and try to destroy your self esteem. When you run into people who insult you its best to just block them and delete them or at the very least close down the messenger you are using. If anyone taunts you by calling you names or racial slurs or any slur that involves a persons sexual orientation you need to understand that the person doing that is trying to project their own questions about their own sexual orientation that they are questioning. This may sound complicated and it is. The people who are the most hateful in reality hate themselves and hate what they are desperately trying to convince themselves they are not (for example being gay or lesbian).

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Teenage Problems - tenth graders

Expert: Jonathan - 10/29/2009

Question
a girl at school has been spreading lies about my son and his family to other students and parents.our disiplinary guide is aware of that situation. now the girl is accuising my son of stealing a large sum of money from her to buy drugs. would this be considered harrassment assuming my boy is innocent these incidents are occuring at school,there also my space trouble between the girls involved.

Answer
Hi Georgette, Anyone telling others untrue statements about someone is considered "slander" if spoken and "libel" if written. The nature of the untruths would be of great concern to me. This girl can be "sued for slander" and whosoever she has spoken to can be called as witnessess. This is considered a civil action. The school as you note has a policy about this and it is probably considered harassment or "bullying" another student. The other part is she is telling others about your sons famuily with the intent of discouraging his fellow students to perhaps avid him or his family or start a campaign of harassment and rumoors against him and his family. If the school does nothing then you should talk to a lawyer which you can do for free . No reputable lawyer will charge someone for an initial consultation. This is of special concern due to the recent suicide of a girl because a mother wanted to find out what thgis girl was saying about her and her family and so she or her daughter pretended to be a boy and flattered the girl and then sudenly cut it off and said the world would be better off without her. The girl believed she was really talking to a real boy which was untrue. She then went to her room and committed suicide. The truth came out later who was behind it. It was an outrage especially to kids who have such limited experience in life. If the girl called the police and said your son stole money from her to buy drugs and it is untrue then that is "a misdemeanoe of "Falsely reporting an incident" for whxcih she can be charged. This girl obviously seems to be on a campaign against your son and now it includes your family. How you want to handle it is up to you. I suggest if you receive no cooperation or think you are not or even if you prefer to, I would call the school district office and make an appoitment to speak to the superintendent of schools. I can guarantee you will receive action from the Superintendent. The last thing they want to have is another incident about a child harming his or herself due to another student causing harassment or bullying. If you need more advice feel free to write back.

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