About Pastor Don Carpenter Expertise I am a father of four and a Baptist Pastor. Before becoming a senior pastor, I was a youth pastor and worker for over 10 years. If you ask this volunteer a question, you will get the benifit of 20 + years experience in the ministry and the counsel of the Bible, God`s perfect book. Feel free to ask any Biblical or moral questions.
Experience I have been involved in pastoral type counseling for 20+ years. Most of my experience has been with chemical addiction, crisis intervention, and some types of severe mental illness. I have some secular training in those areas as well as a Bible College degree.
Organizations Evangelical Baptist Church
Publications Revival Baptist Chronicles
The Fundamental Baptist Voice
Education/Credentials BS in Bible from Baptist Bible College in CLarks Summit PA
Various training seminars in, Co-occuring disorders, treatment of those who have been sexually abused, and Solution Focused Therapy.
Question ok so him 17 my boyfriend will be 19 this December. we started dating the last of august 2008 and we've broke up twice and now we're back together for good. But when we dated before we never argued until now. We argue at least 3 or 4 times a week. I kind think that the reason we broke up before is cause we didn't argue, I've heard that if you don't argue then it's not a healthy relationship. Is that true? Another thing is we used to work together so we saw each other everyday sometimes when we was off too. But now I got a new job and my schedule is crazy we don't get to hang out much anymore, I always stop by his work and see him as much as I can but he never even stops to see me! Also me him and a few friends planned to go to a water park and he was gunman go and then like three days before he went an got a tattoo knowin he couldn't get chlorine on it! He blew us, me especially, off for his tattoo. and he's blew me off for his friends which I don't mind one bit for him hanging with his friends it don't bother me. What bothers me now is that we don't get to see each other now and when we get a chance to sometimes he blows me off for everything else! It makes me feel like him not important to him and it hurts so bad because I love him so much. We both love each other. I know it may sound like that teenage love thing but I really do love him. I can't picture myself with anybody else but him! I cant tell him if I'm mad at him for something cause if I do he says he's a screw up and he's not and I tell him over and over he's not! I don't know what to do. I guess what I'm trying to say or ask is...I need advice please help me. sorry it's so long..
Answer Hi Cierra,
Thank you for this great question. I am so sorry for my very late response. In some cases, your story is very typical. Young people do go through struggles as they learn what being a romantic couple is all about. There is something however that concerns me about what you said. You said that you can't tell him anything because he then goes into a tailspin saying what a screw up he is. There are two things you must know.
1. Some people manipulate others by saying things like I am no good, I am just a screw up so that then their loved one can say... o no you are not a screw up.. I love you... all the while they say those things to hear good things.
2. You need to be honest in the relationship come what may. If you wish for this to go to the next level, you cannot simply bury feelings of being left out... you need to let him know what you are thinking and listen to his side... only when you both come to a compromise can your relationship continue and thrive.
