Teenage Problems/Parents


My mom and dad had me at 22 and after I was born my dad married someone else. When I was younger me and my step mom got along really well until I was 6 and my biological mom abandoned me and I came to live with my dad. Once I moved in I had a hard time coping with my situation and when I got in trouble for little stuff, my stepmom would talk down to me. Now I'm 14 and my dad is only home 5 days out of the month and now that my step mom has had children she is even more harsh. It seems like when I talk to my dad he sides with her and doesn't even acknowledge me. Sometimes her and I get into physical altercations and I always end up as the bad guy. Well today I told her that I felt like what we do to each other could be considered abuse. at first she denied it but then she accepted it and decided to walk out of my life. I really don't know what to do. My dad isn't home often and my biological mom hasn't been here for me in 8 years. What do I do?

Your dad sides with her since he is absent most of the time and he listens to her and does not want to alienate himself from her. As to the abuse issue, you could contact Child Protective Services and then they may take you out of the home and put you in a foster home. The foster home might be worse since the people are doing it for the "money" not out of love for children.
You also run the risk of being sexually abused, but since you are 14 you should be able to prevent this if there is any chance that this could happen. Your step mom is like all stepmoms in that her children always come first. You mean nothing to her. And now that you riased the issue of physical abuse she is "leery" of you which explains her avoding you. You have no father to go to since he is absent and the stepmom is now "absent " as well. Once you get the government into your life its practically impossible to get them out of your life. This is the problem with contacting child protective services. Or social services. They want to insert themselves into every aspect of your life. Its like having to answer to the government about everything you do. To tolerate this situation if you decide to stay then you need to get involved in some youth fellowships, like more than just one. You also need to begin attending church on a weekly basis and relly more often like about two or three times a week. I suggest you find a group of christians and level with some of the women or girls as to what you are going through. There is hope and it begins with God and establishing a relationship with Jesus Christ.  

Teenage Problems

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I have dealt with many young people in a teaching environment as well as in teaching young people at tennis clinics. Since younger people have seen so little of the world their view of the world should not be shaped by the confines of what happens within their family unit. Its natural to be shy about developing relationships outside the home but young people need to know the other person is also probably just as shy as they are. If you havea problem then remember you are in good company. There are no new problems. Someone else has also had the same problem. If you need ideas on how to handle them or some choices to consider feel free to ask. I will answer questions about moral issues and how to handle such issues when they come up in your life. Continue reading about the issue of bullies which can be physical, emotional or sexual as well as bullies who use the internet to spread stories about you. You do not have to be teenager to ask a question here on how to handle this. If you are a pre-teen or tween you may also ask a question here.


I have taught children from 7th through 12th grade. It is all too common for young people to be shy or hesistate because they fear rejection from someone of the opposite sex. You do not have to be a teenager to ask a question here. If you are a pre-teen or "tween" as is commonly used now and are being "bullied" by someone and bullies can be other kids who hit you or as is becoming more common sexual bullying by name calling or spreading stories about you feel free to ask a question about what to do about it. There is also cyber bullying by people who may know you and there can be people who are pretending to be someone they are not who may insult you and try to destroy your self esteem. When you run into people who insult you its best to just block them and delete them or at the very least close down the messenger you are using. If anyone taunts you by calling you names or racial slurs or any slur that involves a persons sexual orientation you need to understand that the person doing that is trying to project their own questions about their own sexual orientation that they are questioning. This may sound complicated and it is. The people who are the most hateful in reality hate themselves and hate what they are desperately trying to convince themselves they are not (for example being gay or lesbian).

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