Teenage Problems/Crushes

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Question
Hi Dalton. I have a crush on my sister's soon-to-be brother-in-law. Only he's 21 and I'm 14. Let's call him David. He hasn't shown any obvious attention in me, but I think he knows I like him. The last time I saw him was in October of 2011. I sent him a friend request on Facebook in November, but he's just accepting it last month. I also looked at his twitter page and 'David' mainly tweets about smoking pot, drinking, girls and a lot of sexually crude humor. I know how some people would use drugs in there college years and I know I don't know every reason why he would WANT to smoke it but it just bothers me. I don't necessary want to love a person addicted to drugs even though I know that happens sometimes. But I'm not sure I love him. I am not even sure I know what love is and I don't know how i'm going to feel about this guy 3 or 4 years from now. Also, since my sister is getting married next month and I'm a bridesmaid, I must walk down the aisle with 'David.' I'm not sure if that's a good idea. Something is just eating at me in the back of my mind telling me not to do it, that it'll lead to a road of hell. But I don't know what it is, and most of the time my gut-feelings are correct. But I have been wrong. And his girlfriend just tagged him of when they went out together 2 days ago, but he hasn't liked it, commented on it made it known to her in anyway on Facebook that he has seen it, unless he messaged her and I just can't tell. So what do you think I should do? And is it just me being jealous, or does it sound like to you that his girlfriend isn't that into him, or he isn't that into her? What should I do about him smoking Pot? I could tell my sister, but I don't want him mad at me and his dad has a small temper and I don't want 'David' to get punched by his dad or kicked out of his dad's house or cut off in any way but I don't want to sit still and watch him throw his life away, knowing I could have done something to stop it. And is it ok that I'm friends with him on Facebook? When I told my sister and her fiancÚ they just rolled on the floor with laughter, so I don't think he's a weirdo or something. One last thing. 'David' has a few pictures on his Facebook and twitter where you could question if he is gay or straight. I don't think he's gay, but his brother has called him a 'fruit.' So what do you think I should do about all of this?

Answer
Not going to beat around the bush in this situation. I'm straight out telling you, forget about it. Move on from it and don't look back. Your 14. Not only could he go to jail if you two were together, but I can promise you that he would not be faithful to you. He is 21 and into smoking pot, drinking, and sex obviously. He will try to use you for sex and then go to college while your at school and sneek around behind you. Its just not worth the risk nor the heart ache.

Hope this helps.

Teenage Problems

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Dalton Brannick

Expertise

I can answer virtually any questions dealing with teen issues. As a teen myself, I have over come so many obstacles in my life to get to where I am today, a happy and successful place. I am 17 with my own business, a happy long lasting relationship, and a past that got me hear. I want to help other teens since I know what it is like to be one with problems.

Experience

Being a teenager helps. But other than that, I had many issues in school with bullying, both being the bully and the one being bullied, drugs, relationships, and being involved with the wrong people. It took many years but I am now in the best place I have ever been.

Education/Credentials
High school.

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