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Teenage Problems/Advice for a growing young girl.


Hi! Im a twelve year old girl, and need some advice for my feelings. Ill get right to the point. I'm 12 as you know and am beginning to feel the stages of 'growing up' and hormones hitting. I find myself being more curious about girl stuff, and stuff like boys ha. I believe strongly against sex, and boyfriends at a young age. But all the same I find myself thinking about it more often. These are some of the questions that float around in my head: When will my breast grow? And is it normal for a 12 year old to not have period and breast yet? What will it be like to have a boyfriend? So you see I'm quite confused with these questions and if I should even care about them. My mom and I have a great relationship, but i find it Very hard to talk to her! We disagree on some things but, I'm afraid to tell her what I am thinking, because I don't know if what Im thinking is wrong. Do you think it is? I kind of lead a totally different life in my mind, or in my room. I don't know much about stuff like sex, and woman health. Sometimes I want to know more, and am wondering if it is good to know or not? This probably is not your important type of questions but, I need some type of advice. Please help. Thanks! :)

Hi Aubree,

These questions that you are asking truly are very important so please don't think that your worries are not valid as they are :)

With periods, it really does vary from girl to girl. My best friend had her period come when she was 10 years old yet I did not get mine until I was 13 years old and another close friend even later so it really does vary.

The same goes for breasts. It was odd when mine started developing because one of them grew first before the other! But as time went on they just naturally adjusted. It does vary and I don't want you to think that there is something wrong with you if you get periods and breast development before or after your friends at school; it truly does vary and every ones bodies are different. So please don't worry, they both will come when your body is ready :)

It is totally natural to think about boys. Whatever your values are, guys will still interest you and that has become what it's like for you now because you are growing up, and there is nothing wrong with that I promise you - it would be odd if you didn't!

Girly stuff is a natural interest as well. Around your age I started getting into make-up, girls magazines, wanting to dress stylish and it is a good feeling because it just means that you're changing into a young woman and it again is so natural to be thinking the way that you are. The great thing is that you Are interested as you'll start to learn about the female mind, the female body, what changes take place as you grow and it is better to know than not know. Puberty is a very important stage in a girls life and it is what you are going through right now. I promise you that this is normal what you are going through and I am glad that you wrote in as it's always good to check with another person that everything is all well, and it is.

I don't know how strict your Mum is - and disagreements with her is natural too because your Mum is a person and you are forming your own ideas so there will be a degree of differing opinions and that's good because it means that you are finding your identity. So if you want to tell your Mum what's going on in your head, start off small, ask her questions about what it was for her going through puberty. Now if she is an open-minded Mum then she will talk to you, but be prepared that she may not want to discuss these issues with you so that's why I say to just start off gently so you can judge how good a listener she is. Then if all goes well with her start telling her more; but you have to find out first what her reaction is like.  

I promise you that all these feelings and questions you have are totally normal and equally natural. And don't worry if your views on boyfriends change over the coming years as they may well, just go with what you feel is right. One day you will meet a boy that you click with and what I would say to you is to build a friendship first and take the time to get to know him before you go further with him.

I hope that I have helped and you did the right thing by writing in to ask these questions :) Any more that I can help you with (if I have!), then feel free to write in whenever you need. Just remember that you truly are 100% natural in what you are thinking about for a girl your age :)

Caroline :)

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Caroline West


Hi.I can answer really all questions regarding to any problems that you are facing at the moment. You can write to me with any concerns you may be having around relationships, friends, boyfiends, girlfriends, sex, losing your virginity - I can answer any worries and doubts you may have. If you are feeling Depressed or Angry and you don't know why, I can help. Plus If you are feeling a bit lost and out of place, talk to me. Is there stuff going on at home that's causing you hurt? Are you having problems with your parents? - I'll help you. Anything as well to do with the Emotions I understand. If you are feeling like you are not coping and/or your school work is suffering, we can talk that through. Are you suffereing from bullying, cyber-bullying? I'll help. Religion, where you may be questioning your Spirituality. Drug and Alcohol problems and questions, if you're worried it's getting out of control or perhaps a friend is going through issues. Whatever's going on around you or inside you, feel free to write in. I'm here to help anyone who's having a tough time and with some tough decisions to make. And if you have wandered off the path a bit, I'll help you get back on track :)


I had a tough time being a Teenager. I had suffered bullying, feeling alone. I was very rebellious too and I hung around with the wrong type of kids and started smoking and I got into Drugs before I was even 13. I lost my Virginity at the age of 14 which I now know is a precious thing. There was a lot going on with my home life and I felt very alone with Parent's that didn't understand me. I became very depressed and felt I had no one to turn to, I felt lost. I'm older now and have dealt with the things that went on and have a better life. So I do understand and I really am here to help anyone that writes in who wants a listening ear and support :)

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I have returned to after a year long break. Before I left I had been with All Experts for over 3 years and worked in many categories ranging from Teenage Problems, Abusive Relationships to Drug/Substance Abuse and many more. I have just returned initially to help Teenagers out that are having problems.

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