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Teenage Problems/Help stop teen from washing clothes all the time.


I know this sounds like a silly issue but it's becoming an everyday thing.

My daughter got tons of clothes for school.  I mean at least 3 weeks worth of out fits.  But every night she wants to wash one shirt or one pants because its what she "wants" to wear.  Never mind she has a room full of clothes.  Its one thing to wash a load of laundry but she is having melt downs because I won't let her run the washer for one item. It leads to huge arguments, feet stomping, door slamming and then half the time she just gets up early and does it anyways after we told her not to.  At this point I'm ready to go in an bag all her new clothes and say if she insists on washing the same 3 outfits that she obviously doesnt like these other clothes and they should go to someone who will.  I haven't actually said that yet but the constant arguments is not helping.  I just want her to wait until she had a full load of laundry without it being a screaming match.

Hi Tina,

Thanks for writing to me.  You did not tell me the age of your daughter.  However, there should not be an argument about her washing one piece of clothing in the washing machine instead of waiting until she has a full load. You are the parent and she is the child.  I understand what you are going through.  

The idea of you bagging up the rest of her clothing is an idea.  However, do not give them away, just put them where she cannot get to them.  If she just wants to wear three outfits, let her wear them.  She is not allowed to run the washing machine for one or two articles of clothing.  She can wash her one or two pieces in the bathtub on her hands.  

The feet stomping, hollering, and door slamming is unacceptable.  If she keeps slamming the door, remove it. That will really get her attention.  When she calms down than you can talk to her and explain what you will and will not accept.  You must get back to being the parent.  If your daughter is of age to get a job, even babysitting, explain to her that running the washing machine runs up the electricity and water bills and she now has to contribute to the cost.

Give her a time, such as Friday night between 7 pm and 10 pm she can wash a load of clothing.  I have always been told that it takes two to argue. Don't let her push you to that point.  

I don't know if you have a wash room, but if you do, put a lock on the door and she cannot use it early in the morning.  This is a small issue that can turn into larger issues if you allow her to win with her temper tantrums.

Dr. Lee

Teenage Problems

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Dr. Shirley M Lee


I can answer questions relating to youth that are on probation, arrested, has anger management issues, lack of impulse control, problems in school and substance abuse issues. Additionally, I can answer questions about youth with sex issues, domestic violence, child abuse, child sex abuse, as the abuser and the one that has been abused, parent abuse, physical, mental and psychological abuse. I answer questions about marriage and divorce. I can't answer questions about medication that has been ordered by a psychiatrist and it's side affects or should you stop taking it. I can answer the question as to what reason the medication was ordered.


I have been providing care, guidance, and social services for children, adolescents, and their families for 32plus years. I work with young people who struggle with behavioral problems and issues at home and school. I assist our youth in developing healthy living habits and motivate them to become productive citizens. In addition, I work with the parents and families to motivate and encourage strengthening the family. I have worked with families that have been homeless, in poverty, peer pressure, and bullying. I currently counsel with youth that are on probation for battery, domestic violence, petit and petite theft, substance substance abuse and sex offenders. I also speak with their teachers and go into the homes and schools. I am a mentor to all these children and their parents. When help is needed beyond my expertise I will suggest where to take the child to receive the proper services.


Published 6 books and were sold at the Christian Book Store for one year.

Ph.d in Sacred Religious Counseling; Ph.d in Counseling Psychology; MA in Public Administration; BA in Paralegal; Clinically Certified Domestic Violence Counselor; CFARS (CHILDREN'S FUNCTIONAL ASSESSMENT RATING SCALE); and for adults the FARS (FUNCTIONAL ASSESSMENT RATING SCALE. I am also a Licensed Clinical Pastoral Counselor.

Awards and Honors
Biblical Studies with highest Honors. Magna Cum laude.

Past/Present Clients
In the past I worked for two different agencies as a Case Manager, a Therapist and a Counselor for the youth. I worked under the leadership of the two agencies as an independent contractor. 3 years ago I began working my own business, which has been in existence since 2002 in counseling. Presently I am working with youth that are on probation and is court ordered to take an anger management and/or impulse control class with me. I am also registered with the county to perform marriage counseling and weddings.

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