AboutDan Expertise I was once an expert on Askme.com, yet because askme is going out, I feel I can help people here. I am an expert in many areas of life, so why not try to be an expert here. State your ages with questions. I do not give medical advice online
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Expert: Dan Date: 8/13/2007 Subject: my past is making things hard
Question okay this is a very hard thing for me to talk about. i'm currently 15 and about 2 year ago i was raped. i got everything settled with that and i've gone to counseling and everything almost back to normal. but now most of the people i'm around are guys. there's some girls too but most of the girls at my school bug me and the guys are funnier. the guys are always by my locker because i'm in teh middle of the hall. that doesn't bug me. the problem is when they start talking about girls and their dates and stuff like that. a couple of times they have asked me to go out with them and i don't for two reasons, 1)i'm mormon and we don't date until we are 16 and 2) i don't feel comfortable around guys. they tell me that we could go just as a group of friends having fun but i still don't feel up to it.(oh and in case you are wondering, i haven't told them what happened. i don't think they really need to know.) because of this they kind of don't come around as much as they used to, not to the avoiding point but it's still less than it was before. my question is how can i feel comfortable going out with my guy friends? i trust them and i know they would never do anything to hurt me but whenever i'm around them i always have the thought of "will they rape me if i'm alone with them?" and another question should i tell them what happened and why i don't feel comfortable being around them in a personal setting? any advice you can give me right now is very much appreciated. thank you.
Answer I am so sorry about the rape. I understand how this did hurt you. It was not your fault. I recommend our rape area, and I also recommend to mention this to your psychologist.
I will have to ask you if you want a hotline for advice. Please state your state if you do.
I will also ask you if you want to talk to me about your friends and if you think this can help you out. I'm here if you want to talk.