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You are here: Experts > People/Relationships > Gay/Lesbian Issues > Transgender/Transsexual > Am I transgender?
Expert: Ray Wigley - 11/3/2009
Question
QUESTION: How can I know if I'm transgender? I'm 15 and think about this question all the time... But at the same rime I think about the ramifications. Like losing family, friends, coworkers... And my family is really conservative. But every time someone calls me Sarah it makes me flinch in the inside. My name is Miles. But then again I like my ling hair and wearing makeup... Am I just having some sort of fetish or meltdown or something? What I'm trying to ask is am I transgender or just going through a phase?
ANSWER: Hi
I would not want to call you by any name that upsets nor assigns a value to you.
You are young, experiencing the hormones racing and have difficulties coming to terms with what all this activity means.
Are you transgendered? Well you could be what was often referred to as a 'Tom Boy'. Rebellious and wanting to try everything. Do you have a sexual feeling for girsl or jecy enjoy a name not strong;y associated to a female. Your details of feelings are a little brief so it is difficult for me to arrive at a firm conculsion as to your position here.
If you want to tell me more then do so. But I do not think you are transgendered just going throug a phase in your life.
Remember if you want to ask more or chat then do so
Regards
Ray
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: But I feel sick every time inlook at myself. I'm tired somtimes and just want to be a guy. I've been a tomboy all my life and even though it is better than being a girly girl I still feel as if it is not enough. I mean, I'm a little frightened of my feelings but I feel as if all my life I've been missing something, and when I started to look up things that I was feeling I found everything I've ever hated about myself was all of my girlish characteristics. My high voice, my breasts, my friends and family's constant nagging to be more ladylike. And everytime I have to shave my legs I want to physically vomit. I don't mean to be explicit, but I just need some guidence right now. Thanks for donating your time to help people like me.
Answer
Hi
Now you are telling me more about yourself and it is possible to give you more advice
First you are becoming transgenedered and even lightly trans-sexual. Many people seem to think trans-sexuals are males with breasts but there are also female to male trans-sexuals.
How can you progress this? Well it is possible to make yourself more manly, but you need supprt from many people to do this. At 15 you still come under the guardianship of your parents so they can and in similar cases often do exert their influence over the person concerned. I would suggest that you continue almost as you are until you are old enough to leave home and then you can develop yourself as you wish.
I said almost and what I mean by this is to let me guide you on treatment and actions that will develop your true identity, if you want to let me.
My email is raywigley@gmail.com so do email there if you do want more
Ray
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