Should I do this?

I have a friend who is a fashion designer and persuaded me that if I assist her every now and then I can borrow some of her clothes.
She has a good selection of clothes such as dresses, costumes, etc.

I do have a female-like body and am interested in the idea but I'm worried that someone will find out about it.


You really didn't give me much to go on here. If your looking for someone to tell you it's OK to crossdress than I will tell you it's OK. You are not alone as there are thousands of "girls" just like you who enjoy looking pretty and getting all dolled up. Nothing wrong with that as long as your not hurting any one.

As far as telling someone a good rule of thumb is to only tell those who have a need to know. I'm sure you have told the lady who you are borrowing the clothes from why you want to borrow them. If not you really should... Your co-workers likely don't need to know, but if your going to be going out in public you might want to talk to a Human Resource manager and let them know. I don't know what the laws are in the UK, but here in the US this type of information when shared in confidence can not be divulged. If someone you work with was to spot you and recognize you dressed in fem, they could make it very difficult for you. Having someone on your side in HR who knows in advance would put an end to any rumors or such that could develop of you are spotted.

The people that need to know would be anyone that lives with you. (wife, girlfriend, partner, etc.) The last thing you might want is for a piece of clothing to end up in the wash and your significant other find it thinking a strange woman has been in the home. Suddenly you will have some serious explaining to do. I've known more than a few who were discovered by their wives and the marriage ended over it. Not because of the crossdressing but the years of deception. If they had only told their wives in the beginning it would have been very different.

Finally crossdressing should be fun. There is no reason why not to enjoy it. After all it does not hurt anyone, the clothes don't know they are being worn by a male or female body. If you can make them look good than go for it. Every crossdresser I've ever known has a bit of a different take on what appeals to them about dressing. For me I have a fascination with make up and shoes... You can say I'm a bit of a make up and shoe whore. If I could only keep my wife out of my make up box... ;)  I'm just glad we don't wear the same shoe size. There is a good friend of mine who will only wear current fashions and designer labels. There is another who goes by the name DeDe. She also wears that name.  I think you can figure out what I mean... Your reasons for dressing is going to be different than mine or anyone else. When you are sharing any activity with others it only gets better.

I don't know what support groups are available in the UK, but a simple Google search should help you find several in your area. Most are very private and will respect your need for privacy. They can also help you with your needs, answer your questions, find trans friendly place to go and shop etc. Plus you can make some good life long friends.

I don't know if this answers your question exactly but I hope I've pointed you in the right direction. If there is anything more I can do, feel free to email me at

Cheryl H.  


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Cheryl H


I can answer questions regarding male to female cross dressing and related issues. I will not answer any question dealing with pornography. If you are a minor and are asking adult related questions be prepared for me to either reject the question or tell you to ask an adult. Run on questions and that go on and on with various amounts of unrelated details will likely be rejected. I don't have the attention span to read 14 paragraphs crammed in to one about your high school crush before you get to the point. Fantasy and fetish inspired aka (Too good to be true) situations will likely be rejected. I wasn't born yesterday and I've encountered my share of TG fantasy. I can recognize the themes. Fictionmania exist for a reason. I'm a hetro cross dresser, this means I do not date men! I'm happily married with 2 sons. So don't bother asking me for a date... It's not going to happen and I will reject your question.


I am a life long cross dresser (male to female) and have been presenting in public for the past 10 years. I'm a member of Tri-Ess (Society for the Second Self). I've had the opportunity to get to know 100's of transgender people and have worked though and with those that are new to the transgender community. I have assisted many young and new "girls" when venturing out for the first time and worked with their families to help come to terms with many of the issues related to this life style. I am not a doctor or have any type of degree in this field, but I have cross-dreesed my entire life. Who better to ask a question about transgender issues than a transgender person. I am willing to answer any question I can concerning the Transgender lifestyle however there are some areas I will avoid.

Member of Tri-Ess, and Sigma Epsilon. (Society for the Second Self, Atlanta Chapter.)

No formal "education" but I have 40 years of experience being a cross dresser. Who better to speak with than someone who has been there, done that, and has the t-shirt. I'm willing to lend an open ear "and shoulder" when necessary to who ever has the need.

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