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My boyfriend is in jail We have been  together for nearly 10 years he used to be very controlling we have 3 children! When he came home last time he had calmed down a bit but he went back and I was pregnant he only has 3 weeks left but the last week he's been saying how nice I look I'm beautiful all the time and he never has said these things before I find it really strange????

Answer
once he gets out he'll be back to his controlling self. Either he has emotional problems and has trouble making happy, lasting relationships .. or he just sees himself as leading you back "to the flock"besides he knows when he gets out,he needs a place to lay his head,eat,etc.
Emotional abusive husband. One minute nice, the next hes back to his old ways,i don't understand why women continue to be doormats knowing he's not gonna change completely.his true colors will show up once he get back into ur heart.you'll never know what to expect.He is a loser. You deserve better. Sounds like he is playing with your emotions and using games to.control you and keep you submissive,free urself before its too late and before he mess ur kids heads up.unhealthy,life too short for drama. bipolar and one day he is sweet as pie then on a dime he can turn to be mean ...if u allow,tolerate him back into ur life,expect the roller coaster effect,trust me.ask self,what have you accomplished with this loser for 10 long yr and he is still doormating u,over and over again,don't never be Needy.Needy men can be among the most frustrating aspects of a man’s romantic life.When it comes to attachment styles, there are two dimensions: fear of being abandoned and avoidance of closeness. A person can be low or high in either of these dimensions, which results in four different attachment styles: assured, needy, distant, and scared. Dating a woman with a needy attachment style can be an emotional nightmare. The needy woman harbors a serious fear that you’ll dump her at a moment’s notice. At first, everything will seem normal. As your relationship progresses, she’ll begin complaining that you’re not close enough as a couple and that she values the relationship more than you do. She’ll be paranoid about any threat ;You can save your sanity by paying attention to these early clues and getting out of the relationship. If you’re committed to the relationship,This man is self-reliant and indifferent to intimacy. he’s not afraid you’ll desert him because he doesn’t plan on being all that close to you in the first place.don’t try to get involved with him or you may wind up feeling used. Respecting you will not be high on his list of priorities.you’ll also need to set up boundaries to avoid feeling suffocated by your relationship.
If you realize you’re dating a needy/controling man, the bad news is that the “problems” in your relationship are more a product of what’s going on in his head than in reality.There are many descriptions that can be used when it comes to how one goes about getting their needs met. While some are called needy, others are often called needless .my prayer is that u put ur kids first,this drama of a man has an effect on them,not just u.be a woman that needs a man not a man who needs a woman.wounded inner child/overly depended man/ If you have someone that is dependent then they won't be able to function without you so it gives the ego a power trip. To wrap this up, both woman and men in this predicament won't have to try hard because their clingy partner won't go anywhere. Just my opinion.need for security -- need for control --he won't leave cause he know no other woman is gonna tolerate nor accept or put up with his insecurities. Some of them need to be whooped into learning how to take care of their own needs emotionally and physically. Some claim to be hen-pecked because they just don't want to do their own rooster-pecking when it comes to cooking their own meals or doing their own laundry or trying to figure out why their jobs aren't making them feel happy and fulfilled. They look to a woman to make them happy, but it's upon them to make themselves happy. Some men go through depression, but refuse to see a Doctor or a Therapist. They expect their wives to be their Doctors and Therapists when their wife simply has no education in those matters, yet they won't take steps to make their own appointments.

Personally, I refuse to be rooster-pecked into carrying responsibilities that shouldn't be mine in a marriage or any other relationship for that matter.Needy is one thing, but when it becomes overly-needy, it is yet another thing!In other words, their neediness becomes an obsession. Maybe due to jealousy for example or they can't stand being alone for very long.Wouldnt be the type of man i would go for, i like a man who can be the patriarch of the household, and be a strong person for myself and my kids to look up to. Not that i am needy, i have always been a very independant person, but a man with an authoritative edge and a knowledge of life draws me in. I dont want to ever have to tell someone how to live their life, i prefer that when they come into mine, they already know and dont need me to tell them.

The only 2 instances i would tolerate a man being dependant on me, is if after being together for some time he became disabled, or of he were to be a stay at home father and look after children and manage the household duties full time.Heaven help them if the strong one becomes unable to cope and the needy one has to strp up to the plate.I think that often spells the end to this type of relationship!  

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any questions,concerns,issues,advice from relationships,family,friends, common sense approach to couples counseling, men and women are intrinsically different and the key to solving relationship issues lies in understanding and honoring those differences and I am here to counsel and grant reconciliation,understanding and hope, spiritual wisdom and healing.Anything dealing with relationships i am here to help.Types of problems such as divorce, separation, death; post-traumatic stress after experiences like rape, theft, auto accident; life changing experiences such as illness, loss of job, moving; important decisions such as ending a relationship or abortion; and sexual difficulties,cheating,depression,how to express yourself. questions on love, romance, dating, and infidelity;Breaking up can be difficult. Have you wondered how to get out of a relationship or how to stop dating someone?get the rules for breaking up and find out what you can do (and not do) to make things easier for both parties.Have you become friends with someone you were in love with in the hopes they would one day see you as more than a friend? Or do you want to be more than just friends with somone you know now? If you've ever been trapped in 'the freind zone' -- or are in it now ,let's talk about it/ When should you have sex in a new relationship? What does a man think when you have sex with him right away? Can sex on a first date ever work out? When someone who makes our heart beat faster comes within a one mile radius of us, most of us feel anything but cool…. So what do you do? Get invaluable tips from relationship advice on what to do when you feel shy and unable to approach the one you want.

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I have been teaching men and women how to find the satisfaction they seek in relationships for more than 25 years,presents a new framework for looking at people problems which expands the range of possibilities for change. my active approach provides help in solving seemingly insoluble relationship problems in a timely way.I view psychotherapy as a respectful partnership. My style is "active" rather than "silent", as I believe people can evaluate and choose the ideas that are useful for themselves. Knowledge and experience with a wide range of approaches enables me to be flexible in tailoring my approach to fit the needs of each particular person. The therapy relationship provides a safe laboratory for experimenting with new ways of relating.My special interest and expertise is in working with people on achieving more satisfying relationships. Through identifying patterns of handling conflict and developing strategies for change, any relationship can improve: at work, with a spouse, with family members, as well as difficulties in establishing a close, intimate relationship. Individuals, couples and/or families can do this relationship work.I have voluntarily worked as a counselor in the past, both with individuals and families. counsel for my church

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Doctorate (Combined Program in Counseling Psychology & School Psychology) Dissertation Topic: School Violence Prevention Masters of Science and Specialist in Education (Counseling and Human Services) Spirituality and Care of the Soul in Psychotherapy

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I hold advanced degrees in Counseling (PHD) and Education (MS). achieved a minor in music while also completing a dual major in Psychology and Education (BA). It means i have been trained to the highest possible level by the most experienced professionals in education and mental health care. It means i can help you — safely and professionally — unlock your full potential.I've dedicated my life study to finding the best ways to help other people. I have a sincere desire to open up your world, remove blocks, and unlock hidden potential.Doctorate (Combined Program in Counseling Psychology & School Psychology) Masters of Science and Specialist in Education (Counseling and Human Services) Dual Major in Psychology and Education with Minor in Music (Piano Addictions, Impulse Control and Eating Disorders, MDD, Bipolar Disorders, ADHD, and Co-morbid Disorders, and PTSD.

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•Resolving Family Conflict: Innovations, Initiatives and Advanced Skills •Self-Injurious Behavior: Assessment, Treatment and the Recovery Process •Art Therapy and Anxiety: Healing Through Imagery •Turning Bullies Into Buddies: A Quick, Powerful and Fun Way to Teach Kids How to Stop Being Victims •The Truth About Children and Divorce, Anxiety Disorders: Research, Diagnosis and Treatment •Crisis Debriefing for Youths and Adults: Effective Techniques to Help Survivors of Crises •Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy: The Basics of Helping People Get Better •Autism: “Building Bridges from Isolation to Interaction”, Multiple Perspectives on Children’s Learning, Behavior, and Development •Ethics and Laws for the Helping Professional, Preventing Medical Errors for Mental Health Professionals, Domestic Violence Update

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Attended the following for licensure requirements: •California Psychology Law and Ethics Update and Review •Child Abuse •Human Sexuality •Chemical Dependency

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