How to Get What You Want in Life/My career.


I feel like I am at a starting point of my career even though I am 28! I graduated in 08 right when wall street crashed, I wasn't able to find a job until May 2010 working at an office that helps ppl on welfare get work or send them to locations so they can work for their benefits and to be honest I truly hated it. I also worked with ppl who had mental issues. I was the only white female working in that entire floor and imagined what I went through dealing with black women from the ghetto. Towards the end I made a positive mark for them to remember. :) I was there for almost four years! This past two years I was so ambitious to find a job but I realized I needed to make my resume more impressive and that stands out. I started doing volunteer work as a stylist, and supported organizations that help children with disabilities. Then doors started to open up...I started getting freelance gigs, part time gigs and I couldn't even get these opportunities until years of hard work!!! Finally after years of struggle and hard work I have been getting modeling work, styling jobs, desiging and even costume design work! Back then I couldn't even get an internship and I was so ambitious and talented!
I just finished styling a pop artist at the end of January and that was such a great experience! I met some great people that way, made connections and continued to network. I met a few good people this way and gotten another styling job through a person I networked. See how clever I am? i don't let things stop me and I continue moving foward and find another way to get an opportunity.  I will slowly nurish and build relationships in the fashion industry in nyc, even if it takes me over 10 years to get to the very top! I will do whatever it takes.
I recently got hired by a very big company down by wall street and I basically work with judges/attorneys on cases that has to do with tickets for businesses. If a business isn't following the laws we ticket them for several different things like if they business isn't recycling then we fine them. I work for OATH. I just started this week and it is an outstanding company and very thankful however I have the lowest paid position and I am only 28! I should have gotten this position when I was 23 right from college!
Here is the big thing that shocked me...I learned that I replaced a girl who was promoted last NOV but she couldn't really move up until someone took her old position which is me! They were interviewing people since NOVEMBER, several people. They were impressed with me and hired me right away! Jesus...excuse my language but my goodness, over two months! Now a days it isn't  so easy getting a job especially with a big company that offers so many benefits!
But moving up can take years....which I fear. ;( I hope I won't be in the exact same position a few years from now which I will be 32! I have a feeling that I will be promoted pretty quickly in the next year. ;)
Thoughts? Am I being too hard on myself?


As I read your question I was reminded of the lines from The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway where one character asks another one, "How did you go bankrupt?".  The other character replies, "Gradually, then suddenly."

I think sometimes we expect to achieve success in life (whatever that means to a person) too quickly.  The Beatles spent years in obscurity before becoming famous.  Any path to success often takes time.  We have to "pay our dues" before we reach the level we aspire to.

So my suggestion is to ask yourself this question, "Is my current path going to lead me to the career I desire in a reasonable time frame?"  On the one hand, we generally need to spend time doing "grunt work" before we rise to our natural level of competence.  However it is easy to get stuck in a dead end job.  Unfortunately there are plenty of employers that are all too eager to focus on their own needs and not take into consideration our talents, abilities and career goals.  While I think this is very short-sighted on the part of employers, it would be foolish not to admit that it happens.

So the real task for you is to make a sound decision based on what you want in life and what you see possible from your current employment.  If possible, I would suggest talking with your manager or HR and asking what they see as your career path.  While they probably will not be totally honest, if you listen carefully you will gain some clues as to how they view you and the opportunities available with their organization.

I also gather that your current job is not directly related to your ultimate career goals.  I see nothing to be gained by laboring as a low level employee at a job that will not directly benefit your ultimate career goals.  I think it would be much better to be in the industry that you want to make your career than spending time in some job that will not directly  benefit your long term goals.

I am not suggesting that you quit your current job without something better lined up.  I believe the best course of action is to develop a network of friends and contacts in the industry you wish to make your career.  Remember that your network should focus on a handful of meaningful relationships rather than simply collecting names/business cards from as many people as possible.  I would suggest you start attending select events in the industry of your choice.  Try to develop a handful of meaningful relationships as a base and gradually build your network.  Also remember that it is best to be of service before you ask for favors.  But eventually you would want to let those in your network know that you wish to transition from your current job.  You might actually start with part time gigs, help out with the events, etc.

I hope this gives you some things to think about and I certainly welcome follow-up questions.


How to Get What You Want in Life

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John Chancellor


How to set and achieve goals, how to find your major purpose in life and the power of focused action. Why you need an emotional attachment to give you the drive necessary to achieve goals.


Coach and trainer. Author Lessons In Life.

Business degree, certified coach

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