AboutWeddings Etc LLC Expertise Wedding traditions, fashions, ceremonies, wedding planning, coordination, customs, how to handle situations that arise, responsibilities, budget planning.
Experience I''ve been a wedding coordinator for 16 years. I authored a WEDDING PLANNING GUIDE, a Bride''s Workbook, that is available in local bridal shops. Tattered Cover Bookstores in Denver, CO as well as local Borders Books and through my website. I''ve worked with weddings from just 2 people to 350 guests and all budget ranges. I've also written and teach The Art of Wedding Coordination to those who want to become wedding coordinators.
Question Hi there,
I'm in a tough situation right now. My fiance and I have decided to have a destination wedding in Hawaii. We would love to have everyone in our lives come and see us and we know our family would definitely be willing to make such arrangements on our behalf. The problem is our family is rather large... our guestlist would definitely be around 150 to 200 people. We want to invite just our very close and immediate family which cuts our list down to around 60. So my question is... What is the best and kindest way to let the others know that they are not invited but we will be having a reception when we get back home to celebrate with everyone.
Please Help!
Answer Dear Nicole,
You can do a couple of things. One would be to send invitations to everyone and let them make the decision if they will attend. My guess is that many won't because of the expense.
Two, send invitations to those who you want to attend the wedding. Then you'll need to send an invitation to those who you want to attend the reception.
No matter how you go about it, someone will have their feelings hurt,but what you need to keep in mind is that this is YOUR wedding day and you should have only those around you whom you want to share the day with. It's your decision who to invite.
Another idea is to send a "Save the date" for your reception. This way people will get the idea ahead of time you are doing a destination wedding and something to look forward to. For example: "SAVE THE DATE of 8/20/08 for a Luau. Invitation to follow." The invitation will read "...you are invitated to a Luau in honor of Susie and William"
When you do your reception, it won't be a "wedding reception", because it's not taking place immediately after the ceremony. Consider doing a Hawaiian theme and have a video of your ceremony so people can see it and feel a part of that. I'd recommend you hire a coordinator to oversee the reception. It's also a good time for you and your groom to wear your wedding clothes one more time.
Hopefully this helps. Please let me know if I can be of any further assistance.
