AboutEmma Expertise I am really interested in weddings, and seeing as I planning my own,and I have planned others, I know a lot about this subject. Ask me about anything from what colors to use or if you should invite kids or whatnot. I can give tips on the reception, food, or the ceremony, anything from A to Z, ask away!
Experience Attend bridal shows to see the latest trends, and have planned weddings for others.
My very good friend, or at least I thought so until recently, honored me by asking me to become a bridesmaid in her upcoming wedding this November. I gladly accepted and everything was just fine until she and I had what I thought was only a minor dispute over something that happened a year before. I brought up the subject, as I had not felt that we had talked it out, as friends should be able to do and she got very irate with me. Long story short, apparently, she dropped me as a bridesmaid, though without telling me. We had reconciled by email and I thought everything was back to normal. Well, about two weeks ago, I received an invitation in the mail as a guest to her wedding and I had not heard anything from her in her last six emails about me being out of the wedding party. My friend was deployed for the last six months and just got home and sent me an email. I had called her after I received the wedding invitation and told her that i must know whether or not I was still part of the wedding. She emailed me back and gave some lame excuse that because we got into the argument back in April of '09, she no longer considered me the close friend i once was. I was astonished to get the invitation as a guest, and she never had the decency to tell me the truth about being dropped. I have done many favors for this friend over the years including taking care of her dog and picking her up from the airport at crazy hours of the morning (military flights) etc. etc.
Needless to say, I am SO HURT and feel so dismayed that she would treat me this way. Now, she is saying that her fiance had to "drop" one of his groomsmen because of the one less bridesmaid (me). I do PLAN to attend the wedding on the East Coast (we live in California) and hold my head up high and be charming and friendly, but I do feel the pain. I am also feeling embarrassed about being there, as the other bridesmaids know me and know no doubt, what has transpired. Please let me me know what you think about this situation and whether you think I should give the couple a present or just attend and be as merry as I can be?
Thanks for your time!
Claire
Answer Hi Claire,
I was in a similar situation with my sister-in-law and was disinvited to her shower only to be reinvited! I attended only because she is family and I HAVE to see her and deal with her from day to day. Being that the wedding is out of state and your friend no longer considers you two close, why waste the time and money getting there? I know it's hurtful but the sooner you move on, the better. If she decides one day to make an effort and try once again to reach out, more power to her. Until then, let it go. Life is too short. I hope this helps!
