How to Work Out Arguments With a Loved One/what can i do?

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Question
Hello!

Am an Algerian engaged with a Pakistanni who's living in the uk, we did our engagement with my family, and he was in love with me , he was begging me to marry him, now.. after our engagement, he completely changed and treating me worse day after day, and am sure the reason of this is the following two things :

1/ we faced a huge problem with our documents of marriage, and our authaurity required for mix mariage to attet and stamp his birth certeficate in Algerian Ebassy of Pakistan, cause he born there, the worse thing is he lives in the uk and dosen't know anybody in Pakistan to attest it for him.

2/ i like laughing and joking, and that irritates him, and he said that am silly and immature and not made for marriage, but simply i just want to have fun with the one i love...

i need help from you expert, cause we're in break up and don't know what to do, he's not calling me neither txting me nor to come skyping....my family always asks about him, but i lie and say am talking to him, cause they will kill me if they know that he changed you know why?.....cause they were not agree on this marriage first place,
everybody in my relatives and of my neighboors know about this relation, and it will be so shame if we break up for my family and i'll kill my self if i don't marry him, i wanna save this mariage!!

Heeeeeelp plz!

Answer
Hi, Kik8! I'm sorry to hear that you are going through all of this. Being from the US, I know our customs and traditions are different from yours so I'm not too sure if my advice will help much.

As far as your fiance goes, what about him do you love? Are you willing to put up or tolerate his lack of a sense of humor? I understand he had some issues regarding your documents, but why should that change how he feels about marrying you? If he loves you, he would stop at anything to marry you.

As for your family, I'm not sure how they would take you not marrying him. Perhaps they will be happy because they didn't want you to marry him in the first place?

Also, killing yourself over a man is NEVER an option. I don't care how you spin it. You can't force someone into loving you or wanting you, but I know for a fact, there is someone else out there who will love you and accept everything about you INCLUDING your sense of humor. In my opinion, I don't see why you would want this man because he dosen't seem to respect you OR your feelings.

Please don't talk about killing yourself and DEFINITELY don't do it because his life is not worth your own. There are people who love and care for you and it will be HIS loss when you find a better more suitable person.  

How to Work Out Arguments With a Loved One

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Kathy

Expertise

I can answer questions in regards to relationships, dating, family issues, etc. I, myself, have been through it all. I also have experience working with depression and am a parent so I can contribute advice through the eyes of both a mom, sister, daughter and a friend.

Experience

I have battled depression and have overcome a great deal. I have been in serious relationships, one for 11 years as well as one I am currently in and both have been incredibly different, but incredibly eye opening. I have a family of women and relationships are all we seem to talk about. I have also worked in a facility with young women in various types of relationships ranging from abusive to non-abusive. I am a great listener and although I lack any "professional" credentials, I will provide honest and compassionate answers and help to those who need.

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I'm just a really good listener and an older sister, a mom, and a girlfriend. I have experience with relationships..trust me.

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