How to Work Out Arguments With a Loved One/Tone of voice over the phone

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Question
I need some advice on what to do. My husband and I have been married for 2 years and together for a total of 9. I love him to death, there are so many amazing qualities to him, but Iím struggling with one problem we have. When I call him to talk he always sounds so annoyed, I ask him whatís wrong but he very time says nothing. I try and accept that answer cause heís told me in the past that he hates it when I keep pushing when I feel that there is something wrong. Personnel I want to know if there is cause I cant fix anything I did if he wont tell me. So during the conversation with his tone my tone changes to perky to a lil agitated. It seriously feel like heís annoyed, pissed off, what not and it makes me feel like I did something. So It goís to a nice conversation to ďok your tone of voice is really bothering me and you donít want me to push on that situation so Iím getting off the phone. Iíve had calm conversations with him that he should maybe try and change his tone , but he has a whatever attitude. How he sees a lot of things is, this is how I am if you donít like it well learn to deal cause Iím not changing.  Also he never texts me anymore. Iím allowed to text while at work, I donít do it much but Iíll text a quick do you want chicken or fish for supper? I want to know so I can plan in my head what to cook and if I need to stop at the store Iíll know before. I wont get nothing until I call, and again he sounds so annoyedÖ Its really bothering me and I donít know if its me and Iíve overreaching or its him. I feel like Iím just an annoyance to him now.

Answer
Hi Stacy,

You are not asking for the sky, just a simple sms or at times  a short sweet call. You've discussed this with him before and explained your views so now stop talking about it. In fact stop calling or texting him for next few days. It will be difficult but instead you can write things on a piece of paper and tear it later. Observe the effect on him. Also what kind of job is he  into? Is it a place where he can't attend phone calls or is into some work where a phone call can disturb him?

Regards,

Vani

How to Work Out Arguments With a Loved One

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Vani

Expertise

Can handle all questions pertaining to arguments/difference of opinion among friends, spouses, family, colleagues. The crux is to understand the causality and personality of the people involved in such a complex situation.

Experience

Being the eldest child in the family and also one of the eldest in the immediate family, I am a very popular person. About 15 years of work experience has also made me an expert on how to juggle with family and work life in a more balanced manner.

Publications
I am an expert on Indian Culture and Inlaw Relationship at allexperts.com

Education/Credentials
Masters in Business Administration

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