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About Kay Lewis
(Top Expert on this page)

Expertise
I have a Masters degree in Social Work. I can answer questions about relationhips, communication skills, preparation for marriage and handling the issues of sick parents.

Experience
Family relations, domestic violence and life skills training.

Education/Credentials
BS Social Work
MS Social Work

You are here: Experts > Teens > Teen Advice > How to Work Out Arguments With a Loved One

Questions Answered By Expert Kay Lewis
In Category How to Work Out Arguments With a Loved One

Subject	Date Asked

Controlling mother	9/1/2008
Q: I met this seemingly nice girl last week and found out she likes me alot(I am interested but before ... A: Actually, until you get to know this girl better and come to understand her personality and her ...
im an idiot	8/28/2008
Q: So about three weeks ago I was bored on AIM (aol instant messanger) and decided to joke around with ... A: He thought you had forethought and self control but talking about hooking up with someone you don't ...
Frustrated	8/25/2008
Q: I am dating a man that is very strong willed and sometimes thinks he does nothing wrong. He has a ... A: You can't. Why do you think you can control his behavior? Face the fact that he has not intention ...
love verus sex	8/25/2008
Q: I am I'm successful Hispanic and I have been in a relationship with a Asian female 24 who still ... A: There is only one option in this situation and that is to do what is in the best interest of the ...
q	8/18/2008
Q: I came to the United States when I was 17 years old with my family from overseas. Now I am 31. ... A: I do understand that rules are very strict in your homeland. They are not so strict in America. ...
husband help	8/18/2008
Q: My husband and me have been married for a year and a half. We have through alot together and he has ... A: Have some other fathers talk to him about his concerns. It seems he is not focused. This is ...
Non-existent sex life	8/13/2008
Q: I'm a 42-yr-old single mom with a great boyfriend. He buys me dinner, brings me flowers, respects my ... A: You should seriously consider anything you may be overlooking. Does he REALLY like you ...
Girlfriend and her family culture	8/11/2008
Q: I am 32m successful Hispanic and I have been in a relationship with a Asian female 24 who still ... A: The decision is made. If she thinks your kids won't add value to her life, you must move on. She ...
My boyfriend won't ever argue	8/9/2008
Q: How can I deal with my boyfriend (10 years together) who bails out of every argument by saying "I ... A: Find out what he thinks of arguing and more specifically what he thinks of you two arguing. He may ...
very wierd best friend relationship	8/6/2008
Q: I asked my best friend to date me 8 months ago, she said no. Oddly, we have now become closer than ... A: I have seen this situation before. You will have to treat her like anyone else you like that did ...
marriage disagreements	8/4/2008
Q: I am 30 and wife is 32 and been married almost 4 years with 1 11 year old step daughter. To make ... A: You two need to discuss how you will handle arguments. There needs to be an agreement on what ...
help me asap	8/1/2008
Q: Ok so over the past two months me and this boy became very close i feel like we had something I ... A: Your story sounds sweet on the surface. But when I look below the surface I see a guy who wants a ...
I hurt my girlfriend very badly	6/22/2008
Q: I'm 17 years old and so is my girlfriend. She and I have been together for a good long time. For a ... A: Get together with her and work on the issues that you brought up to her. Figure up possible ...
at a dead end	6/18/2008
Q: I'm 20 and my girlfriend is 19. We've had a few arguments but this is probably the worst so far. We ... A: You two miss each other greatly when you are apart. The arguments are symptomatic of that. Find ...
Please help!	6/13/2008
Q: I am in quite the predicament here and I hope you can offer me some advice. I am a proud and strong ... A: One thing is for sure, it's very easy to be religious in jail. It will be more difficult for him ...
Fiance Friend & I are not getting along	6/9/2008
Q: My Fiance and I are getting married next May. Were very happy however he wants his friend whos a ... A: Her jealousy is expected. All his friends may have feelings about how his life will change. She ...
Pregnant girlfriend	5/14/2008
Q: Well, three years I met this girl who became my best friend, and then about six months later we ... A: You have no legal right here. And a child should be with their parent. I think it is best that you ...
making things right with my ex	5/9/2008
Q: My girlfriend and i have been together for 19 months now. days ago she broke up with me. At the ... A: I believe all you can do is wait and hope she forgives you. Meanwhile you could improve your ...
Should I stay or go	5/8/2008
Q: I have been with what i thought was my soul mate for 3 years now and it has had its ups and downs ... A: Ask him what he wants from you. If he needs a couple days to think about it or to get the nerve to ...
Should I stay or go	5/8/2008
Q: I have been with what i thought was my soul mate for 3 years now and it has had its ups and downs ... A: It sounds like he is not happy, yet he isn't discussing it with you. Since you have no clue what is ...
How to break-up and not feel guilty?	5/5/2008
Q: I started dating an older guy about 3months ago.I am 24 he is 32. He told me that he was an ... A: Let your anger about being lied to be your guide. You have a right to your feelings and a right to ...
i dont no what to do anymore?	4/15/2008
Q: ok so i have been dating my boyfriend for about 4 years now. He has a very bad anger problem and i ... A: Check to see if there are any colleges that offer counseling to the general public. Many colleges ...
lying	4/14/2008
Q: First off, thank you so much for taking the time to answer this. I really need advice and answers. ... A: You brought home strangers from the beach. The group of strangers included guys. You did not ...
I don't know what to do	4/13/2008
Q: Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 4 months (not that long I know) I'm 19 and he's ... A: You are not confused. You don't want to be in pain. Who can blame you? Unfortunately, you won't ...
fed up	4/12/2008
Q: I am in my early 40s and my boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years. We currently live in my ... A: Addiction is not my expertise. Please go to the Alcoholics Anonymous page and find a support group ...
my parnter always starts arguments when we go out/see friends	4/9/2008
Q: i have been with my parnter for almost 2 years. my parnter does not work and i cannot at the moment ... A: If you can't go on like this, don't. You already made your decision. The more difficult part is ...
Hmm.	4/9/2008
Q: Well to make a long story short, I'm 20 he's 21, we've been together for three years. The first two ... A: If you could control him, there would be something you could do. In this kind of situation, he has ...
cheating	4/4/2008
Q: my boyfriend and i have been together for a little over 1 1/2. we already have a 10 month old son ... A: There are three things to do in order to move on. 1. Each of you needs to stop bringing up past ...
Boyfriend is very secretive with this phone	4/2/2008
Q: My boyfriend is sneaky with his phone, Im not allowed to see it because he needs to keep his ... A: He's hiding for a reason. What part of his manhood would be in jeopardy if you saw his telephone ...
Kay Please Help! THANK U!!!!	4/1/2008
Q: First of all thank you so much for taking in my question. I am under a lot of duress, and issues. My ... A: I think the question is what is your deal. He and his friend were having a private conversation. ...
I need help	4/1/2008
Q: I really need your help. i'm 24 and i live alone in Sarajevo, 50km away from my parents, friends and ... A: I know that you loved the person he used to be. The truth is that you don't love the person he is ...
I have a question	3/22/2008
Q: I have a problem, my girlfriend of ten years and I decided yesterday to take a break. She has ... A: It sounds like this relationship has not been healthy or happy in about four years. There was ...
Boyfriend seems slow to accept responsibility	3/15/2008
Q: My boyfriend and I have been living together for a few years now. In the beginning of our ... A: He is not one of your special children to help via therapy. He is your boyfriend. That means he ...
family issues	3/13/2008
Q: my girlfriend and i dated for almost 6 months. were both 24. she was looking to get married. ... A: I think that family visits are very important to her. They indicate preparation for marriage in her ...
MAD ALL THE TIME FOR NO REASON	3/12/2008
Q: My husband is always mad at me and when I ask him why he just wont talk to me then when a couple ... A: You may want to offer him alternative ways to explain his anger. For example he could write it ...
Arguements over nothing	3/11/2008
Q: Can you please help me. I have been in a relationship for the past 7 months. Right now we trying to ... A: You probably feel a little empty cause you keep denying what you think and feel as you are trying to ...
What should i do?	3/10/2008
Q: I and my bf have been dating almost 1 year and we got along pretty well until his mum made up some ... A: He's not making his own decision or taking a stand. When he's with you, he agrees with you. When ...
I was young then, an idiot now	3/5/2008
Q: I am sorry for wasting your valuable time since I'm just a messed up person trying to get advice ... A: The real question here is why have you not done anything to improve your situation. You say you ...
Lusting husband	3/5/2008
Q: I have a friend who has a husband that looks intently at other women in her prescense. She is tired ... A: You just said it. She can not change him and he will not stop. If he is unwilling to admit there ...
ex	3/1/2008
Q: my girlfriend broke up with me 2 months ago. i keep trying to get a reason from her, but she ... A: I don't know her. Since she did not give you the answer to these questions you will never know the ...
A Break Up	2/28/2008
Q: my name is Michael and about 6 months ago I was on the Sunshine Coast and I was looking for a ... A: I really couldn't tell you how to get her back. But if you even want to be friends with her, you ...
2 issues	2/25/2008
Q: you answered my last question with: "I just took her at her word about you not coming into her job. ... A: Yep. Dude, now that you mention all these details, I can say she simply never did have romantic ...
mom and daughter - grown people	2/25/2008
Q: BACKGROUND: Most of the time Stacy (54 years old) goes ALONE to the 99 cent store to buy the ... A: Surely this does not sound like a situation between two older adults. I do think that Stacey's mom ...
2 issues	2/25/2008
Q: you answered my last question with: "I just took her at her word about you not coming into her job. ... A: Now, we are in business. It seems she has difficulty expressing her needs. It could be her own ...
relationship	2/23/2008
Q: I've been dating this guy for 9 months now. He hasn't asked me to be his girlfriend yet cause he ... A: You two have differing definitions of how a relationship should go. On the other hand, he has ...
Wow...	2/23/2008
Q: I am in the bad situation: My boyfriend now views family, marriage, sex, and relationships as bad. ... A: I think he is on a journey you can not comprehend. He has emotional problems that made him do all ...
How to work through finding out my 15 yr old just lost her Virginity	2/22/2008
Q: 40 yr old mom of 5 in desperate need of input and guidence & support. I was having a sit down talk ... A: The best way to work through this situation is to arm her with information. Your child needs to ...
Maybe we are not right for each other!?!	2/21/2008
Q: I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years now. I moved from the midwest to live on the west coast in ... A: He's got problems that he needs to resolve on his own. It is not that you two aren't meant for each ...
me and my mother	2/20/2008
Q: I have a question. Me and my mother got into an argument about 2 weeks ago and we're still not ... A: Find her and apologize. Also, try to understand her view and your nephews father's view of how you ...
2 issues	2/19/2008
Q: my girlfriend and i dated for 6 months. were both 25. i never thought i did anything wrong, and she ... A: I just took her at her word about you not coming into her job. It would have revealed that she is ...
2 issues	2/19/2008
Q: my girlfriend and i dated for 6 months. were both 25. i never thought i did anything wrong, and she ... A: First we have to consider the fact that I don't have all the details of the relationship and we ...
Relationship Question	2/18/2008
Q: ..I have a relationship question and I hope you can help me. I met an amazing guy online line 2 ... A: I agree with him that once you saw the relationshp becoming deeper, you should have told the truth. ...
Comunication Skills	2/18/2008
Q: I need an advice. I've been in a relationship for 6 years with a great guy, he’s respectful, ... A: Many mama's boys are willing to discuss problems or even argue about problems. You fiance' simply ...
me and my boyfriend	2/15/2008
Q: my boyfriend hasnt talked to for 9 days because we got into a fight ithrew eggnogg in his face and ... A: Don't participate in manipulation. Practice restraint and leave him alone so you can devise a ...
me and my boyfriend	2/14/2008
Q: my boyfriend hasnt talked to for 9 days because we got into a fight ithrew eggnogg in his face and ... A: Give him at least another week. Then offer him several suggestions on alternative ways to express ...
no life of his own	2/12/2008
Q: I have been with this guy for 2 yrs 7 months (our anniversary is today actually). I love him so ... A: He's not ready to be on his own. Many people are very family oriented. They prefer to stick close ...
spouse's lack of information	2/6/2008
Q: I think it's good manners but the hubbs disagrees. When the phone rings, and we are both home, and ... A: The problem is not so simple. You two have a general communication problem. I bet there is other ...
Getting married	2/1/2008
Q: I am currently engaged to be married. When I first got engaged last year my family was excited about ... A: I am sure you know plenty of ways to express yourself nicely. Just choose one. The key here is to ...
Getting married	2/1/2008
Q: I am currently engaged to be married. When I first got engaged last year my family was excited about ... A: Once you get married, there will be many decisions you make that your family will disagree with. ...
my boo	1/30/2008
Q: i am being a jerk and i don't know what to do cuz i love her so much and i need her more then ... A: I can feel your pain. I will need more information in order to help you. But in general I would ...
Boyfriend Troubles	1/30/2008
Q: I have been going out with this person and i thought things would be great because he is older than ... A: It all depends on the topic of the argument related to your health. Is he giving you good advice ...
jealous girlfriend	1/25/2008
Q: First of all thank you for your time in helping me with this. I am a 60 year old grandmother and ... A: I understand. Basically, when you are able to communicate with him, you will only be sending a ...
jealous girlfriend	1/25/2008
Q: First of all thank you for your time in helping me with this. I am a 60 year old grandmother and ... A: You never know if a relationship like this is just a phase or mistake that could last 15 years. In ...
Help	1/23/2008
Q: well... For the past 3 years there has been this girl in my school who i have like alot and was ... A: I am sorry, Daniel, but I think it's best to leave this dating situation alone until she gets ...
Help	1/23/2008
Q: well... For the past 3 years there has been this girl in my school who i have like alot and was ... A: Nobody should jump from liking someone to being in a commited relationship. It takes time to find ...
Emails and lying..	1/23/2008
Q: Ok, first I want to thank you for your time. I met a girl at a sports league who instantly stole my ... A: Once at a point that you can't handle another big break up, it's time to take care of yourself. You ...
Chronic Fighting with Boyfriend	1/22/2008
Q: I have been dating my boyfriend for over 7 years. We are currently living together and have been ... A: You are correct about focusing on many other relationships. Become active with several other ...
Chronic Fighting with Boyfriend	1/22/2008
Q: I have been dating my boyfriend for over 7 years. We are currently living together and have been ... A: I know what you mean. Don't sit around feeling unloved. Get engaged in new activities with old and ...
brother and mother conflict	1/22/2008
Q: My younger brother is in a relationship in which he has taken on the role of "father" to a two year ... A: It is completely possible for you to support your brother and continue a relationship with him while ...
He constantly frustrates me!!	1/22/2008
Q: My boyfriend and I (I'm 20, he's 22) have been together for a year, and been living together for a ... A: These are all symptoms not the basic problem. I can't tell what the problem is from this writing. ...
Relationship	1/18/2008
Q: I'm doing just fine.I'm going through a great challenge.I have been dating a separated man for the ... A: Your suspicion is enough to make a person break up a relationship. Drop that. Your relationship ...
ex girlfriend	1/17/2008
Q: i dated my girlfriend for 5 months. everything seemed fine, and then all of a sudden she said she ... A: Every woman is different. But yes, if problems never occurred in a long term relationshp, you ...
ex girlfriend	1/17/2008
Q: i dated my girlfriend for 5 months. everything seemed fine, and then all of a sudden she said she ... A: She probably had needs that were not being met. That happens when thoughts, needs and problems are ...
brother and mother conflict	1/17/2008
Q: My younger brother is in a relationship in which he has taken on the role of "father" to a two year ... A: I am afraid he may be in over his head. His girlfriend might have some issues that are difficult ...
brother and mother conflict	1/16/2008
Q: My younger brother is in a relationship in which he has taken on the role of "father" to a two year ... A: Your family may be treating the child differently because they don't know her well. Unfortunately ...
Me and my girlfriend arnt connecting	1/13/2008
Q: I'm going to sum it up for you. Me and my girlfriend have been together for 3years now. When we ... A: If she is able to do so, the two of you should sit for a long talk. During the talk you should ...
Should this be Goodbye?	1/8/2008
Q: My husband David and I have been married now for about 3 months. When I first started dating him I ... A: It definity takes more than six weeks to get to know a person. And knowing them well plays a huge ...
First few months of marriage	12/27/2007
Q: My husband and I just got married in October this year and it seems that we've been fighting ... A: All couples fight a lot in the first couple years of marriage. It's an adjustment period. Each of ...
arguing ALL the time	12/26/2007
Q: me and my boyfriend have been together for about 6 months and i feel about him more than i have ... A: There may be something big bothering him that he has not told you. Holding in feelings will make ...
Gf being unreasonable/ Confusing me with her ex?	12/12/2007
Q: I hope you can help on this one here goes! I'm 23, male. About 2 months back I met a girl in a ... A: I don't see a clear reason for her behavior in what you have typed. She could be going through any ...
losing my friend.....	12/10/2007
Q: I’m 18 years old, in college, and I have been having a great time so far. This is my first year in ... A: Maybe Lamonts behavior has more to do with him than you. He is confused about his love life. Don't ...
Compromise	12/10/2007
Q: My question is do you think it is fair for a man to ask a woman to marry him, with the expectation ... A: Why would you think it does? Your beliefs are not his beliefs and you can't force them on him. ...
marriage questions	12/8/2007
Q: ok we moved from nd to ga -- he is unemployeed right now poss has a pt job coming now -- before we ... A: Here is a resource for people addicted to pornography and sex. ...
marriage questions	12/7/2007
Q: ok we moved from nd to ga -- he is unemployeed right now poss has a pt job coming now -- before we ... A: There is no way in the world that you can control his behavior. Taking his web cam and anything ...
Being Good Enough	12/4/2007
Q: My name is Jessica. My (boy) friends name is Jonathan... I'm seventeen and he is eighteen... I'm ... A: The way you live your life is proof of whether you are living for youself. Even if you tried to ...
Being Good Enough	12/4/2007
Q: My name is Jessica. My (boy) friends name is Jonathan... I'm seventeen and he is eighteen... I'm ... A: You need to become better able to handle stress. You need to create good coping habits and make ...
Follow up	11/29/2007
Q: Your answer: You need to actually change so you can stop messing up in the first place. It is not ... A: It seems like you have found a starting point. Define what actually went wrong in the relationship. ...
Follow up question...	11/29/2007
Q: Your answer: "You need to actually change so you can stop messing up in the first place. It is not ... A: You are exactly right. Yes, people in relationships do forgive and accept each other as they are. ...
Boyfriend questions.	11/21/2007
Q: I hope you can help me out a little. My boyfriend and I have been dating about 1.5 years and we ... A: Most likely the arguing comes from frustration. Each of you may be frustrated by the seperation, ...
Arguments among friends	11/20/2007
Q: I am not sure if you are the right person to ask but hopefully you can give me some insight. My ... A: I'm thinking that each of you was going through stressful times when the arguing started. Now that ...
conflicting interests?	9/23/2007
Q: I am 21 years old and have been in a wonderful relationship with the love of my life for the past 6 ... A: As you said this is all part of the adjustment phase. The arguing is normal. As you create a new ...
boyfriend	9/23/2007
Q: i have no idea what to do in my situation...my boyfriend is upset that i went out with a black guy ... A: I hate to tell you this, but you can't solve his problems. He either leaves the issue alone and ...
How to move forward	9/23/2007
Q: My husband and I seem to be stuck in a difficult place because I believe that he still blames me for ... A: He just wishes everyone would get along. His family has a culture very different from yours. This ...
the boyfriend	9/14/2007
Q: I would just like an outside perspective on the situation with my boyfriend. For the last 9 ... A: It sounds like you have more on your schedule than he does. So he has time to spend with friends ...
Between a rock and a hard place	9/13/2007
Q: I have been with my girlfriend for almost 2 years now. I feel she might be the one which I will ... A: Physical attraction has a real impact on relationships. It's undeniable. I think the reason you ...
I let too much out the bag how do I fix this situation?	9/13/2007
Q: Me and my boyfriend have been dating a little over a year, I'm 24 and he's 26. What happens is that ... A: It seems your difficulty is that you have a lack of people to hang out with. Of course you miss ...
Boyfirend trouble	9/11/2007
Q: I am 22 and my partner is 39. We have a 18month daughter and trying for another. He asked my if we ... A: Your answer did not include him at all. It was all about you having another child. The answer you ...
Can these differences be surpassed?	9/6/2007
Q: a little history: I'm in a relationship that just passed it's one year mark. After two months of ... A: No fatal flaws or gender diferences here. You just have differing likes and dislikes. No couple ...
How much to care?	9/5/2007
Q: I've been married for almost a year now, and I'm running into a problem with my wife: Any time we ... A: Don't women usually love to talk about the problems? what does this say about me? No. second, ...
Why does he always have to be right?	8/29/2007
Q: Ok, stupid as it may sound, any time I say anything that is not "great" about him, he gets defensive ... A: I am soooo sorry. The behavior must have put me on the wrong track. Here are some thoughts. 1. Is ...
Why does he always have to be right?	8/28/2007
Q: Ok, stupid as it may sound, any time I say anything that is not "great" about him, he gets defensive ... A: In similar situations, it turns out the child actually wants to improve relations with the parent. ...
DRAMA	8/28/2007
Q: I have a boyfriend that i have been with for about a year and a half now. About 3 months after i met ... A: He is scared by your depression. If you are still attending counseling, take him with you. Discuss ...
im confuzed bout my gf	8/28/2007
Q: me and my gf ( both 15 )hv had an argument about 2 weeks ago so we went to seein eachother once a ... A: I think she may want some space. The loving text is a good sign. You could ask her directly if ...
Problems With Sick Mother	8/27/2007
Q: I am hoping for some advice with an ongoing conflict between my Mum, my husband and I. My husband ... A: If there is no way they can get along, then the solution may be to move out until you deliver the ...
pet issues	8/24/2007
Q: I am an engaged 25 year old 4th year medical student. I live with my fiance and we have dated for 2 ... A: Most people I know somehow put their dog on a long chain in their back yard. That way the dog can ...
20 year old needs help	8/21/2007
Q: My son who just turned 20 has had a long term relationship with a girl 5 years to be exact. In ... A: I do understand your concern. The true issue at hand is not these relationships or his education. ...
20 year old needs help	8/21/2007
Q: My son who just turned 20 has had a long term relationship with a girl 5 years to be exact. In ... A: He seems depressed about the breakup and depressed about the prospect of a successful relationship ...
My Girlfriend	8/15/2007
Q: I have a couple of issues with my girlfriend. First of all she seems to get a kick out of ... A: She seems emotionally immature. Only experience and education will mature her. You would have to ...
husband throwing fits	8/13/2007
Q: been married for 43 yrs.,Had my two grandsons spend two weeks visiting and at the last four days my ... A: It sounds like he needs some type of counseling or medical help. Some physical illnesses make ...
Fiance hates me looking good	8/12/2007
Q: My fiance seems to totally against anything I have done or plan to do in the future to remain ... A: I did not mean to be insulting. I was attempting to point out the differences and why they could ...
Fiance hates me looking good	8/10/2007
Q: My fiance seems to totally against anything I have done or plan to do in the future to remain ... A: He wants to grow older gracfuly and enjoy the natural way that God made things. He wants to get his ...
Wife insecured	8/2/2007
Q: I have been married seven months and going through some jealousy issue. For the past months my wife ... A: That is another issue you should discuss with her. The chemical changes in a woman's body can cause ...
right or wrong	8/2/2007
Q: my girlfriend of 3 years Divorced) continues to wear her engagement ring ,although on her right ... A: If she's single, she can wear the engagement ring whenever and however she wants. The ring has no ...
Wife insecured	8/1/2007
Q: I have been married seven months and going through some jealousy issue. For the past months my wife ... A: The issue here is not that you seem to be looking at other women. The issue is that you two don't ...
winning back my ex	7/30/2007
Q: my fiancee of 5 years left me 3 weeks ago. She is 20 and im 24 and in September last year we bought ... A: You resorted to trying to overdose. That is a sign of a HUGE problem for which you need to get ...
Realationship Problem	7/29/2007
Q: Hey, I am Craig I'm 17, well I have a problem in my realationship. My girlfriend says she loves me ... A: It seems like you might be getting on her nerves. You should ask her if you are coming on ...
Traditional Husband In Denial	7/18/2007
Q: Help!! My husband and I lived together four years before marrying eleven years ago. At that ... A: That means he changed the entire plan without consulting you. I think the bottom line here is that ...
Traditional Husband In Denial	7/17/2007
Q: Help!! My husband and I lived together four years before marrying eleven years ago. At that ... A: You said that before you two married he made it clear that he wanted you to stay home with the kids. ...
My wife and I	7/16/2007
Q: Jennifer Where do I start? My wife and I started to date early in our lives she was 16 and I was ... A: You two are definitely different people than when you met. Plus much has happened that needs to be ...
I feel horrible	7/7/2007
Q: It was the fourth of July and I had invited my mother, father, and sisters to my house for a ... A: I can understand your parents being caught off gaurd by your statement if they truly did not intend ...
help	7/5/2007
Q: i am 16 and my boyfriend is 17 and we have been going out for almost 7 months. And the past month we ... A: It's up to you to decide what you think it means. Is it that he is having difficulty dealing with ...
Missing my sister.	7/4/2007
Q: I am 39 yrs old and my sister is 36. We are 2 of 5 kids that were raised in a very close knit ... A: You've done everything you can do. She has to want to get out of the relationship of change it ...
Ugh	6/22/2007
Q: I'm 19 and my boyfriend is 20. We've been together over two years. Lately, he's not been saying "I ... A: He doesn't want to hear mess from his family. They react to any informatin they hear about you. He ...
Boyfriend & Porn	6/20/2007
Q: My boyfriend and I have been together for over 2 years. I love him so much, and i know that he loves ... A: I really don't know why men and women look at porn when they have access to sex, but they do. It's ...
Equal relationships between men and women	6/19/2007
Q: I am a 25 year old intelligent, well-educated woman, who holds some strong feminist views. I believe ... A: The Feminist Movement is not based on emotions. Don't let your views of what you want and don't ...
I want my girlfriend back.	6/13/2007
Q: well basically to cut a long story short, i'm a guy of 22 and recently started dating my girlfriend ... A: You two were in a phase of getting to know each other. During that phase, she may have seen some ...
arguements	6/12/2007
Q: My husband and I have 3 children..the youngest 4 months. We have not been getting along and are ... A: The things you described are not the problem. They are expressions of the unhappiness. He does not ...
Recent Argument	5/23/2007
Q: Earlier today I had a talk with my girlfriend about some things that have been troubling me for a ... A: You are correct in thinking that her problem is an individual problem. She has to work on being ...
arguing with boyfriend	5/20/2007
Q: I recently broke up with my boyfriend of over a year. The arguments were getting pretty bad. So bad ... A: Try these web sites about anger management. http://drphil.com/articles/article/221/ ...
Fights with boyfriend	5/16/2007
Q: I have been with my boyfriend for almost two years, and most things are great. We love each other, ... A: In the situation about being driven to the airport, you could have let him call his parents. They ...
Communications W/ Love One	5/9/2007
Q: I have an issue that I have been working on for the past years, but it doesn't seem to work. My ... A: The truth is that your husband lived his life long before you came along. He must have accomplished ...
Leave Family Friends For Her Career	5/1/2007
Q: I'm engaged to a young lady who is in the reserves and was active duty for 2 years away from ... A: The bigger issue here is that you two have a fundamental difference in your family values. You are ...
My boyfriend and i always fight.	4/27/2007
Q: I have been dating my boyfriend for almost 9 months now. DUring the first 2 months i fell compleatly ... A: He can't be your boyfriend, hanging buddy, hobby buddy, entertainment, counselor, advisor and every ...
Rough Spell	4/25/2007
Q: my boyfriend and I have been dating for a little over a year now, and here recently we have been ... A: Each of you needs to get down to the real reason that you argue. Individually, you need to think ...
Mexican-American Relationships	4/23/2007
Q: I'm an American woman in a relationship with a Mexican man. Since the second month of our five ... A: I agree with your viewpoint. But what you don't seem to understand is that his behavior can be part ...
anger problems	4/17/2007
Q: I have a problem with anger. My girlfriend and I separated because I got so angry and it scared her ... A: It would take weeks of work for you to develop new habits. I suggest seeking counseling, getting a ...
serious relationship problems	4/16/2007
Q: I am in a very troubling situation. I have been with my boyfriend Robert for almost two years. ... A: I am truly sorry to say this. I don't see a relationship here. Romance, friendship, love, trust, ...
friendship and dating	4/13/2007
Q: Please help!!!!!!!! I like this guy. I have had feelings for him for over 6 months. I stayed away ... A: It looks like everything you said is correct. She should have been able to handle the news from ...
BOYFRIEND	4/5/2007
Q: I need some advice on how to save and repair my relationship or if I should just walk away. We have ... A: Use material from a counseling office or a doctor's office to educate him about the diagnosis, ...
Love	4/5/2007
Q: What should I do to get back the girl that I love? Let me give a brief history, to make things ... A: I think all you can do is try to be friends with her. That way the two of you can start fresh. ...
How can I make my girlfriend trust me again?	4/2/2007
Q: I met my girlfriend online and we've been together for about 3 months. When we first started going ... A: Her behavior probably means she is mad at you. There is a chance she will get over it. Especially ...
relationships	4/1/2007
Q: I am at a bit of a loose end, I hope you can help. Iv been going out with my boyfriend for nearly 2 ... A: You probably are angry that you had to give up your education. He is aware that you feel that way ...
My Mother	3/23/2007
Q: I am not sure if you are able to help me since this is more or less about my mother but if you ... A: It seems like she has been the way all of your life. In that case there may not be much she is ...
dating a single father	3/16/2007
Q: I've been dating a wonderful and affectionate divorced man, for over 8 months. My problem is his ... A: That is nothing to base a conviction on. Many people rub their child's back and hair for a couple ...
forgiveness	3/11/2007
Q: I will try and make this brief but so much has occured. Ive been in a relationship for 7yrs.I ... A: Unfortunately, if he does not face the issue and try to resolve it, then the situation could be ...
breakup	3/4/2007
Q: My boyfriend and I go to school together. His grades have not been good this semester. Recently said ... A: He probably is very distracted by things outside of studying. I had an ex break up with me for the ...
Fight w. my boyfriend	2/23/2007
Q: my boyfriend and I have been together for about 4 months. He has a very close female friend who in ... A: It seems he has control over himself. You, on the other hand need to get a grip. Stop looking ...
serious trust and control issues	2/21/2007
Q: This is a long question, a two year question.If you don't know anything about Zodiac and horoscopes, ... A: Get counseling. You don't simply have a problem of arguing too much. Each of you has issues of ...
boyfriend issues	2/8/2007
Q: My boyfriend of two years has recently chosen a religion that has convined him that sex is nothing ... A: There is no middle ground. He can't have sex because it is against his religion. Drinking is the ...
an on going argument	1/25/2007
Q: my boyfriend has to be to work at 6:30am. it is a 20 minutes drive to work. he sets his clock 15 ... A: Why are you asking me? You only have three choices. 1. Go to bed and wake up on his schedule. ...
communication	1/12/2007
Q: I may not have been clear- this argument wasn't even about "us". I'm the most even-keeled guy in the ... A: I know what you are saying. But you have to understand what she is saying. You are talking about ...
communication	1/10/2007
Q: "Can you please help mediate a very serious disagreement? My girlfriend and I were having a ... A: Judgine from your words, I can tell you like to debate. Don't turn every argument into a win or ...
Concerned about a 14 yr old	1/3/2007
Q: yet rather some advice on a problem that my friend Ana is having with her daughter; below I am ... A: They need FAMILY counseling. Cutters are usually expressing emotions by hurting themselves. They ...
a fight	12/12/2006
Q: My partner and I are in the middle of a HUGE quarrel and we need an outside opinion. Your profile ... A: Okay, you're splitting hairs when you start seperating the sexualities. IN A ROMANTIC,COMMITTED ...
communication	12/10/2006
Q: I'm having a problem with the person I've been dating for the past three months. He's a sports guy ... A: Your just dating. YOu are not going steady or engaged. Datling is a process of getting to know ...
Different priorities	11/22/2006
Q: I am 21 and my boyfriend is 23. We've been together for almost 4 years and have lived together for ... A: The problem is not money, work, school or a messy house. The problem is that niether of you is ...
Finding a counselor/ How do we find middle ground?	11/22/2006
Q: My wife and I are having problems related to where we live. We have a 8 mo girl who is amazing to ... A: I think you two should find a counselor. There are several things to check on. 1. Does your wife ...
Issue with 16 year old son	11/19/2006
Q: I would like to get an expert’s take on a situation. Here is what happened. A couple of years ago, ... A: Let him suffer the natural consequences of his actions. If he could buy and XBOX he can pay his ...
Ex-Girlfriend and apologies.	11/18/2006
Q: I tried to apologize to my ex-girlfriend about all the mistakes I made during our relationship, many ... A: You need to actually change so you can stop messing up in the first place. It is not wrong to ...
Fiance talking to ex's.	11/7/2006
Q: First of all, let me give you a bit of history on my fiance and I. We've only been together for 5 ... A: You are trying to develop rules to make someone be faithful to you. The bottom line is that she ...
lieing and arguments	11/7/2006
Q: My best friend at the time didnt like my bf but despite what she thought I remained with him... her ... A: YOu two have to agree that it is safe to discuss what is happening with friends and ex's. Once you ...
Ex	11/5/2006
Q: I’m 15 years old. My ex is 17 I have a big problem me and my ex separated after 2 months, since then ... A: I went through this exact situation in college. What he is doing, is based on how he is dealing ...
confused	10/31/2006
Q: I have been dating my bf for 3 years. we have lived togther for two. I have had issues with him ... A: I understand your concern. At the same time, this is an issue of his that he needs to resolve. ...
hey	10/30/2006
Q: My girlfriend and I are thinking about getting back together.... I want to keep the spark alive if ... A: That feeling may just be you fearing losing the relationship before you get to fully enjoy it. The ...
Ugh	10/25/2006
Q: My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year and a half, I'm 18 soon to be 19, and he's 20. ... A: You were correct to invite him to counseling. At this point neither of you is mature enough to ...
Communication	10/24/2006
Q: She believes, in her opinion, I was bothered by changing stations for her and that's what made her ... A: I can see that. I can see everything you said being true. It's just one of those situations in ...
married and lost love	10/24/2006
Q: We stopped talking about 1.5 years or so - we stopped little things one at a time - like the I love ... A: Here is an old book that gets good results. I hope you can find it or something like it. "Divorce ...
Should I be concerned?	10/17/2006
Q: On several occassions, I have found evidence of my boyfriend looking at porn on the computer. ... A: Looking at porn is common. You have a right to feel it is a betrayal. And he should consider your ...
dependance?	10/13/2006
Q: I'm having problems with my relationship. My girlfreind is 16 and I guess you could say she doesn't ... A: The one thing that is for sure is that you started something that you can not finish. Don't ever ...
my mom is driving me crazy	10/13/2006
Q: It's hard to explain, but my Mom seems to have this kind of ability to just drain me and make me ... A: It sounds like your mother is concerned about you and a bit stressed out. You are correct that you ...
arguments with my boyfriend	10/10/2006
Q: Me and my boyfriend have been together for a year now. But sometimes he makes me mad and says ... A: The problem here is that he is not trying to fix problems. So your relationship is at a stand-still ...
relationship	10/4/2006
Q: Can i ask somthing about what relationship really means? I have an gf and our relationship last ... A: 1. Whether there is a chance or you two can still be together depends on what happened between you ...
Spouse and Parents	10/3/2006
Q: I would like to seek your help in the following: I am 26yrs female, married and mother of two ... A: First of all stop seeing the other guy. YOu are using him as an excuse to quit your marriage. You ...
Possessiveness	10/3/2006
Q: It's been 11 months since I started seeing this guy. In the meantime, we've had a couple short ... A: It sounds like you are getting yourself into a dangerous situation just because you want to be with ...
Lying	9/29/2006
Q: I have been dating my boyfriend for a year and 4 months now and we have never really had a problem. ... A: Be honest with youself and him about why you lied. He will appreciate that you gave him this ...
argeuments and break up	9/25/2006
Q: "i met this woman a month ago and then became friends and before you know it i became her very ... A: The truth is that she needed someone who could handle the fact that she was new to having a ...
How to resolve problems sucessfully..	9/24/2006
Q: Do you have a list of steps you would suggest to couples who want to resolve problems sucessfully ... A: Try a book entitled Divorce Busting by Michele Weiner-Davis. It's chapters outline the steps of ...
losing the passion but we r getting married	9/22/2006
Q: .i'll be getting married in another 3 months. When i started going out with my bf we were very happy ... A: The issue about the best friend is unresolved. When people get married, things have to change. ...
Argument	9/18/2006
Q: But how do I talk to him about it...he told me that somedays I worry him and he won't tell me why ... A: Unfortunately, he MUST accept the fact that you have a life and you enjoy it with and without him. ...
Argument	9/18/2006
Q: Last night my boyfriend (who is 21, 4 years older than I) and I got in an argument over IM (which ... A: He had his heart set on trying to get to see you. Then he was let down when he learned you might ...
How to get my bf back!!!!!!!!	9/15/2006
Q: me nd this kid hav benn going out 4 a year but then as we eneterd a new school i dumped him for a ... A: This question is not about an argument between people in a relationship. There seems to be no ...
amor	9/15/2006
Q: Followup To Question - an expert in dating wrote this to a gay whu think he did not behave ... A: I am completely unfamiliar with this that you are sending me. I had no part in it. As you can see ...
help sos	9/7/2006
Q: my 4 year marriage is scarry. he insisted i sign a prenup, where i basically signed off on all my ... A: Well one issue is that such a marriage has been his only example. He may have never learned to ...
My girlfriend wants to leave	9/4/2006
Q: I have been in a relationship with this girl for about 4 yrs. We moved in together last year and ... A: If your jealousy is the only problem then your changes are on the right track. It's just that right ...
Wedding	8/30/2006
Q: but one question is remaining. After all the name calling and insults to the grooms family, should ... A: I think the inlaws should attend the wedding. The bride was stressed, out of control and unaware of ...
Wedding	8/30/2006
Q: but one question is remaining. After all the name calling and insults to the grooms family, should ... A: I think they should overlook the insults. She was stressed, out of control and unaware of the ...
Anger management/conflict resolution	8/29/2006
Q: It's not that we argue too much...it's the intensity when it happens. For example...this last ... A: In situations like that, you should watch what you say. That statement said when you said it, IS an ...
she doesnt care !!	8/28/2006
Q: Iam 21 years old Iam ingaged one year ago. we love each other a lot. but what makes me crazy is her ... A: Of course you know that the two of you need to come to a compromise about the cost of the wedding. ...
Anger management/conflict resolution	8/25/2006
Q: Please give me some pointers on how to deal with my husband, who I love dearly, and his inability to ... A: I would need more details about the arguments, your response and his response in order to give a ...
confused	8/21/2006
Q: well my question is or more likely a consern. i have recently moved in with my boyfreind who ive ... A: The first thing you need to do is consider whether you are not seeing things accurately. You two ...
Weight Issues	8/17/2006
Q: My boyfriend is 20 years old and has just finished college and has a full time job. He's an ... A: When you think of talking to him about weight gain, take all the words that indicate a negative ...
Past relationship	8/6/2006
Q: I have a great girlfriend now. But i also had a great girlfriend before. We lived together for 12 ... A: Personally, I would only make such changes for a wife and a new life with her. I think you two ...
boyfriend cheating	8/4/2006
Q: boyfriend has cheated in past, says he's changed? I'm not 100% sure, and he says I don't love him ... A: It's difficult to get over something like this. But it is something the two of you have to work on ...
Dog causes marital rift	8/4/2006
Q: My husband and I went to the shelter to get a nice dog. We did not find anything we both agreed on ... A: I am sorry that you have such an aggressive and playful dog. I feel sorry for the dog. I suggest ...
Relationship - Love, Romance, Cheating	7/29/2006
Q: 1. What is cheating? My girlfriend slept in the same bed with my friend while knowing i would be ... A: 1. It's not cheating. I could not know why she would do that. 2. You have to get to know people ...
Relationship question	7/24/2006
Q: I'm a 23 year old female with a 6 year old daughter and a 4 year old son. I have been with my ... A: A general fear of commitment is not normal. Feeling that a person is not the one you want to commit ...
About a Boy...Please help	7/23/2006
Q: So heres the deal. I met my cousin’s best friend’s brother, ‘Jason’, over AIM. We swapped myspaces ... A: In my experience, the ones who truly love you come back. They either ask to be friends or they ask ...
My Lady will not talk to me.	7/21/2006
Q: I don't understand how I can improve my behavior when I do not instigate issues. I am fairly easy ... A: Apparently she wants things to change in the relationship. I have given you what professionals ...
My Lady will not talk to me.	7/21/2006
Q: I think she belongs to a womans support group. I would be more than happy to do some counseling. I ... A: Okay so you don't know that she belongs to any group. Don't blame your issues on people outside the ...
communication	7/20/2006
Q: i was wonderin if you have any sugestions on how i can help my boyfriend open up to me, and talk to ... A: Mikayla X, There is a saying that if what you are doing is not working, try something different. ...
My Lady will not talk to me.	7/20/2006
Q: My Lady and her kids went on vacation to Florida, for the most part we had a good. The kids were a ... A: Well, long trips are hard on anyone. She may just need time to calm down from the trip. If she ...
Computer Addiction	7/19/2006
Q: It has been going on our entire relationshipMy Husband is addicted to computer games. This a huge ... A: Maybe you can ask someone who knew him before you got married if he has always played video games ...
Can u help plz	7/19/2006
Q: . Cam and I have been together for a year and 4 months and he says that its pretty good bet we will ... A: At least he realizes his issues. It seems like he is working them out in his own time. It is ...
relationship trouble	7/17/2006
Q: I was dating a guy for about seven months before we broke up. For the past five months, we've been ... A: I read your entire letter. From what you described, he was never as into you as you were into him. ...
letting of the past	7/12/2006
Q: My old (& first serious)boyfriend of 3years &I were together for a year before he went away to ... A: Well there is no question here. I understand that you are hurting but I still must be honest. You ...
bf trouble	7/6/2006
Q: okay, so i have been dating my boyfriend for a year and almost nine months now. things have been ... A: Your complication goes even further. If Jacob is a decent guy then he won't date you until you have ...
boyfriend issues	7/4/2006
Q: Hey. I've been with my boyfriend for about 4 months now and before we were going out, we used to be ... A: A relationship is based on trust, friendship and good treatment. You make it sound like he gives ...
girlfriend not keeping word; lying to prevent upsetting me	6/19/2006
Q: Six months ago I started a relationship with the girl with whom I believe I will spend the rest of ... A: Two people can never agree on everything. Apparently she is trying to protect you. YOu have only ...
constructive arguing	6/16/2006
Q: My boyfriend and I have been living together for almost 3 years. We each have 1 son and we recently ... A: Feelings of disrespect and disregaurd lead to couples avoiding one another and not wanting sex from ...
relationship	6/14/2006
Q: i'm a 30 year old male, my soon to be wife is 9 months pregnant and full of doughts of me and wether ... A: I suggest that if there is anything you have difficulty saying in person, write it in a letter to ...
Relationships and Moving on	6/12/2006
Q: The relationship was great totally up until I felt the need to follow up with issues, that I didnt ... A: Obviously there is nothing you can do inside her household. She has to deal with her affairs the ...
Relationships and Moving on	6/12/2006
Q: Where to start, my now ex girlfriend has 3 children 11, 15, and 17. There have been incidents in ... A: Actually, I don't understand much of what you wrote. Also, your question is not clear. Are you ...
PLEASE HELP!I'M CONFUSED!	6/6/2006
Q: This guy is making me feel like I'm losing my sanity. Been together,off and on 3 years, he's cheated ... A: Any chance you give him should be given from a distance for about a year or more. You and the ...
Lack of trust	5/29/2006
Q: I am 17 and my boyfriend is 20. We have known each other since I was 14, it has been quite a ... A: Yes vaginas feel different as a girl your age matures, gains weight, hormones change and such. Once ...
I dont know what to do nest	5/25/2006
Q: Last yr a mate of ours came 4a visit&she annoyed me 4some of her actions&her ways and way of ... A: Krista, Maybe he simply feels like this is a difficult situation so he did not know how to respond ...
Moving out.	5/10/2006
Q: So, Before I got your response (thank you for the quick response btw) I wrote my girlfriend a ... A: I expect she did not see your response coming. I think she needs some time to think about what it ...
realation ship troubles	5/9/2006
Q: Me and my girlfriend keep having a lot of little fight and arguee about these stupid thing, and i ... A: I think you are correct. Those little fights can become something big. On the other hand, they ...
Ultimatums and Counseling	5/9/2006
Q: I am a 31yr old lesbian and I have been out for about 8years. I have had at least 3 significant ... A: I believe this can be handled one issue at a time. The matter of the two of you coming to common ...
Moving out.	5/8/2006
Q: My girlfriend is 23 and I am 24. We have been together for almost two years. We got together while ... A: It sounds like she has made it clear that she no longer wants the relationship the way that it was. ...

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